Hi

I am in need of some advice.

I have a 4 year old child who has had AA since she was 9 months old. She has now just lost all her hair for the second time in the period and has just the white downy hair, which I think is quite common and not regrowth of any sort.

When she lost her hair for the first time at 12 months old, it was not a problem as she was a baby and nobody really noticed. Now she is 4.5 she is aware of her hair loss, last summer she had a full head of beautiful curly hair, and she knows she is 'different'.

To me she is beautiful with or without hair. However, I want to ensure that I do what is best for her, now. She is at school. I have explained her situation to the teachers so they are aware. She is not overly bothered at this stage about being bald, but her awareness is increasing with some of the things that she says. For instance "Mummy I want hair like yours" , "I want long hair", "I want to put clips in my hair like my friends".

I recently discovered Freedom wigs and have been in touch with them direct and know the process quite well. I have spoken to her father also about the wigs, but his mother, my daughters grandmother, is now trying to dictate what I should do, and trying to make me feel guilty about considering the wig option. I find some of the comments rather ignorant, even though she considers herself educated.

Please see a snippet from the latest email from Granny dearest below:


4.The wig must be put on precisely each day to achieve a perfect fit. She would not be able to manage herself and would always need adult support. It is easy to damage the silicone base, negating the vacuum effect.

5. To keep the scalp and wig hygenic a daily and weekly complicated maintenance is required. The vacuum fit does not allow the scalp to breathe. Go to and open Freedom Hair; human hair wigs; female hair loss & alopecia areate. Tap on Product Information/Haircare/FAQ. This is essential reading

7. The mothers, of the daughters with alopecia were greatly stressed at their daughters loss of hair, one due to the culmination of a distressing illness, the other through non growth from birth. With Freedom Wigs their daughter's hair loss is now treated as a secret. Freedom Wigs were introduced at the start of a new school allowing a pretence that the hair was natural.

Wigs should be treated in a light hearted way, a "form of dressing up". Or like any head covering - with perhaps two or three to choose from - one could be funky. A pretty waterproof cap could be used for swimming.

I am in favour of the open non-secretive approach. It makes me profoundly unhappy that the hair loss must be made an embarrassment to be shrouded in secrecy.

As for going down the route of a Freedom Wig - I think it would be unsuitable for Madeleine. Bearing in mind the logistics of acquiring, its high maintenance and particularly frequent shaving her little head - no, no, no.




My daughters hairloss is not a secret, and will never be treated as a secret. I want to do what is right for her and hope to keep her confidence intact. If she wants a wig and hair, should I not look to get his for her if it makes her feel more comfortable?

Does anyone have experience of these wigs? I have also heard about the Petite Gripper wig.

I would love to hear about people experiences, and comments to the email above.

Thanks.

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You can get free wigs for children from hair club america and celebrity style wigs. Why not start there and let her decide how she feels about it?
Thanks, but I live in France
Contact celebrity style wigs on the internet and see if it matters where you live.
Ah family !

If your daughter wants to wear a wig then let her, if not that let her wear whats she wants. While I'm sure your relative has the best interests at heart it is simply not her decision.

I've been AU since I was 4, and I wore a freedom\barrington HS wig in my youth, its not a magical shield that will hide alopecia, keep it a secret as your Granny says, its a mere accessory for being able to get through the day without being instantly identified as different. I was still open to people about alopecia but if you go out to a strange place (Shopping, Restaurants etc) its always nice not to hahve everyone staring at you simply because you are bald.

Even in the 80's it only took 5 mins to put on in the morning, it was washed once every 1-2 weeks but as a child growing it meant a new wig pretty much every one to 2 years due to my growing up and I beleive the time to make one is very long.
My son has had Alopecia for 7 years. He has always wanted hair we tried a vacum type ig at age 7 when he first lost his hair, it was new to him being bald and a wig was something very overwheming for all of us. We paid $1500 or our. It was not worth it, number 1 it looked horrible, and number 2 he knew it! After 7 years and junior high he wants hair again! I researched lots of companies and I have found Second Nature Hair a freedom wig dealer to be our best decision for him. It is costly. But when I saw his eyes light up trying on the peices she brought with her I was ok with it. He knows it is not something we can say it grew back overnight! We are going to say one day I want to go with hair and one day I want to wear a cap! And I think that is how you should talk to your daughter. As she gets older its not something that can easily be hid with sleepovers and swim parties. I pray that my son will be able to tell his story and he will become a stronger human being. It is so tough being a bald teenager, and gets worse as he gets older because of peer pressure and if he hides behinds his wig I think it will put so much pressure on him so I encourage you as I will do for my son to buy the wig for your daughter so that she can feel normal but let her know we love them either way and its ok to go with or without it!! Go luck and check out Second Nature Hair we are waiting for our sons. He is so excited!!! God Bless You!
Thanks for your comments, I am deciding what to do now so will keep you posted.
Whatever a child wants and whatever will help a child accept a loving gift should be more important than an adult's inconvenience or war with an ex or mother-in-law. If your daughter even just uses it for a short time period, your sharing of her excitement will be what she remembers. Kids change their minds all the time. I'd say, accept the free gift for now. She will be changing her mind a million times over the next 20 years!
Its not a free gift. I am quite keen to get the wig, but am getting resistance all the way.
Why not just a synthetic: cheaper, no shaving. Kids will not be easy on an expensive wig, and it sounds like all she wants is to look like you. Less upkeep with a synthetic. There are lots of child options for wigs on this site. Then you can also keep the in-law and ex at bay. Can you introduce your daughter to any other children her age with alopecia who don't mind going wigless, so your daughter can feel okay either way?

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