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How to come out hiding and wear whatever wig you want to out in public? Help. How did you do it?
an article a co worker gave me about alopecia in the recent parents magazine states " Alopecia is life altering not life threatening" so true but that person who wrote the article probably has no idea what it feels like, I wonder if they have Alopecia????? How has it affected you? Do you go out in different wigs and who cares or do you like myself go out in the same type style so as not to tip people off about the condition? I wish I had the umph in me to go out in whatever wig I chose and just be me. I am a rather postiive, happy , and strong person, but not with this. You think after 4 years I would be ok, but no , I try not to show it, I think do they know? are they feeling sorry for me? Crazy eh, I know but how did you get over that feeling of omg they know, or they can tell. I am self concious about it still, not around close family at home, I will go bald for short times. But never go outside of the house, or even out of the yard with a diff wig, it is the same type style as the old me. Please share how you came out and was just you? I need help on this one.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Lexi on
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I just wrote something on another discussion forum - It is this: hear all the insecurities! I go around with my straggly hair everyday, or wearing a baseball cap, and I don't know who I have become anymore. I wish I had the confidence to not care who was looking, who was talking about me, making comments, rolling their eyes, and not care what they thought. To wear different wigs every day, whenever I wanted, would be so nice. I feel better about myself with more hair. I wish I had the confidence to wear them to work, and not care about the gossipping and looks.
I hear you, also!! I go to the same places every week, as do we all. I see some of the same people. Even though most don't know me personally, like the grocery store and Wallyworld. The say hello because they know me from going there every week. I feel foolish going in a wig, and least of all different wigs, I would get stares. People would wonder things. Why is she wearing that wig? Who the heck does she think she is? Who is she trying to be? Who is she trying to impress? It looks wiggy...She looks silly. I imagine all the things being thought about me.
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Permalink Reply by Georgia Kay Jarman on
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Hi Lexi. I know exactly how you feel. And no one that I've talked to (that does not have the problem-- alopecia) understands. For some reason I don't care if someone that I don't know sees me in a wig---(out of town etc.)or my closest friends--but why is it that acquaintances I see every day in public, or in a restraunt, or other usual places I go bothers me? I say that I don't care what people think, but I must, otherwise I would just put the wigs on and go. I would love to hear more from others that have this problem. I appreciate Alopecia World so much.
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I also appreciate it. I sometimes just don't understand how some people have the self confidence to just go out in wigs, and different ones, and then sometimes a scarf, and then sometimes just the way they are. I don't have that kind of self confidence.
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Permalink Reply by Mary on
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I wish I could do a Vulcan mind meld (for those of you who remember what that is) and just GIVE other women the feeling I have about this now. I wish I could've told MYSELF this 5 years ago.
I really don't care who sees my bald head. I remember so well when I was terribly afraid that anyone might notice my bald spots, or see me in what I thought was so obviously a wig....I obsessed about it, I cried, I raged. I did NOT have any self confidence about it at this time 5 years ago. I felt like my life was over.
Then I started just going out places bald slowly...it's all on my page, and most of you are probably tired of hearing me talk about it. I really wish I could share this "place" I'm at with it...I try to do that by posting videos and photos and blogs. I feel the pain you're in and I understand it. I just with we didn't have to feel this way, and that it could be no more difficult for us than it is for a guy who's losing his hair and shaves his head.
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Permalink Reply by Gwen on
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I wear different wigs all the time or at least when I buy a new one. I don't go out in public bald. Maybe to get the mail I will but that's it. I've had alopecia for 10 years now or so. I don't mind people knowing all too much. When I get complements on my hair I always tell them its a wig. When I was in hair school I even took my wig off once in a while. Most people were really open with it and thought it was awesome. Most people don't even realize I wear wigs at all unless I say something or know me . One thing I can't do without is my eyebrows at least with guest at the house. I think I'm more worried about that than my actual hair.
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Thanks for all the input and support. You are all so special and have such valuable opinions.
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Permalink Reply by Denise on
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Gwen, I have new eyebrows, wig ones I LOVE EM, I feel human again , not the sick look. I know exactly what you feel.
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Just checking back in on things. I am in a smidge, of a better place, a smidge which a little more toward where I need to be. I have been alternating between 2 smilar but slightly diff wigs, people haev noticed a slight change but nothing drastic. I do have a longer one with beautiful curls and want to wear it out. So will do it to the next hockey game. It will be my test of stength. I will let you know. :) Thank all you for your courageous words.
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