Alopecia World
www.alopeciaworld.com
New girlfriend - telling her about AA tomorrow
Hey, guys! My name is Kevin and I haven't participated in any forums in a long time. I have been happy lately and I only come on here when I have a problem. I will try to come on here more to support you guys and everything we go through together as our own little community. I have AA. Fortunately for me, my head hair is still up and running. Unfortunately for me, my eyebrows are gone, along with all of my right eyelashes and my leg hair. Despite losing all of the above, I disguise myself and fool people every day of my life; even the girl I've been dating for a month, and have been talking with for two months. This girl is so gorgeous, but even more beautiful on the inside. She feels for me so much and loves the way I treat her. We are so much alike and we click instantly and can talk about anything. Even if we don't have plans and we're just hanging out, we make it a really fun time. But all this while, I have been disguising myself from her and keeping her from the real truth about me - my biggest secret. It hurts me inside to hide it from her, but I know that if a girl knew about my AA before she got a chance to know me, I wouldn't get a chance at all. That's just been my mindset these past 8 years. But I actually think my girlfriend now would still give me a chance even if she had known. However, this conversation tomorrow still frightens me. I always kind of trap girls and make them fall for me first, then tell them. One time I told a girl I was talking to for four months but not dating yet, and she played it off like she didn't care, then dumped me a week later. It's girls like that that don't deserve me, or anybody else but some douche bag. But that really affected me, and has an impact on how I am feeling about tomorrow, regardless of how nice my girlfriend is. Anyways, I am just fishing for some good lucks and will keep you posted about her reaction. This is always tough - there will be tears on my end because of how much Alopecia sucks. The worst thing about Alopecia is how we have no control over it. We only have control over who we tell and how we act when we're in public. If she accepts me for who I am tomorrow, then I could give two fucks about how I look towards other people. I seriously need this; not only so I can continue this amazing relationship, but also to look Alopecia in the face and say, "Fuck you. I can date anybody I want and you can't do anything about it." I may not be able to grow my hair back tomorrow, but I'm able to grow back my confidence. Thank you for reading this. Please keep me in your prayers as I will for you.
- Attachments:
-
-
Gala 2.jpg, 85 KB
-
Replies to This Discussion
-
Permalink Reply by Jason on
-
Good luck Kevin, thanks for sharing your story. I can easily relate to what you're going through. Best of luck and keep us posted.
-
Permalink Reply by Mz Tracy on
-
Hey Kevin... I'm newly divorced and DATING again OMG!! I've been wereing a wig now after 13 yrs ago dealing with Alopecia due to a Illness. I find it best to be upfront about my hair rather than to wait to disclose it. The response has been great so far. I just recently embraced my BALDNESS and rock my bald head in public OMG the freedom I felt was great!!!! Exposing who we are makes others feel our strength. I hope that woman know that hair does not make the MAN but his Substance does. GOOD LUCK my friend!!!!
-
Permalink Reply by chris for hair on
-
I hope it goes well for you. Keeping secrets makes life too complicated. You have to know that you are just fine the way you are and not worry that you are unique.
-
Permalink Reply by Debs on
-
I met my boyfriend on a dating website I told him I. The first 10 mins I was wearing a wig. He didn't react at all. On our 3rd date I deliberately answered my door without a wig so he could see what I look like sans wig. I advise you not to make a big deal about being AA. Just be casual about it. Our partners take their cue from us. If we treat it as a minor thing then they do too. It isn't a deal breaker if somebody likes you.
I am sure you girlfriend will be perfectly ok about this. Just mention it very casually but you don't need to tell her about the angst that alopecia brings in it's wake. I am sure you Re attractive to her hair or no hair.
GOOD LUCK
-
-
Good luck Kevin. Be confident and when you're just about to tell her, think of all of us here cheering you on in the background :)
-
Permalink Reply by Jackie on
-
Wow, I can relate so much to this post. Good luck~ let me know what happens! :)
-
-
She sounds amazing - and if she is as lovely as you say she is, she will love you just the way you are! Good luck.
-
-
Hope everything went great!! Good luck! You're in my prayers!!
-
Permalink Reply by Kevin H on
-
Thank you guys so much for the support!! I told her about a week ago and she was like, "That's it?!" She was so happy to hear that my health wasn't in jeopardy. She said she could care less about hair and all she cares about is how I treat her and how I can make her laugh whenever. She really is a blessing from God. She later told me in the week that she loved me and she will always be there for me during the good and bad times. I am so happy you guys can relate to what I had to go through when telling her. I think we (I) may make a bigger deal about it at times than it really needs to be. We will all find that one person who can make us smile no matter what and won't judge us at all. I truly love you all - in a totally non-weird way. You're all in my prayers as well. Thank you again so much. I am so happy to have shared this experience with you!
-
-
Yay. A lovely story. So pleased for you.
© 2024 Created by Alopecia World.
Powered by
