Alopecia World
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Some people are just RUDE! :(
This weekend I had 2 really bad experiences. One was where I was in a restaurant sitting beside a table where a lady & her husband was sitting. The moment she saw me she started joking with her husband that I am wearing a wig & its funny. :(. I had to change the table coz I wasnt in mood to fight back but, I did give an angry look at her whenever she tried to stare at me.
Another was when I was standing outside & 2 women started speaking loudly with each other & laughing and saying "hey is she wearing a wig or what?? Go & ask her!!!" That idiot lady was actually coming towards me to ask this!!!!!!!!!!! Before she got the chance to come near me to ask or maybe stare more, I moved away from there. :(....I HATE SUCH RUDE PEOPLE!
Another was when I was standing outside & 2 women started speaking loudly with each other & laughing and saying "hey is she wearing a wig or what?? Go & ask her!!!" That idiot lady was actually coming towards me to ask this!!!!!!!!!!! Before she got the chance to come near me to ask or maybe stare more, I moved away from there. :(....I HATE SUCH RUDE PEOPLE!
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by lynne on
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thats awful, those people are not worth it, they have such unhappy lives that they feel they have to try ruin someone elses, very selfish, keep ur chin up, x
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Permalink Reply by Blessed Soul on
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U r rite Lynne. They just have big EGO!
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Permalink Reply by Georgie on
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WTH? I agree with you, how can people be so rude and insensitive? It seems every DAY I ask myself: Why can't people just be nice to each other? Darts to them for their bad behavior and laurels to you for not letting them get to you. ;)
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They dont realize that they mite have such difficult moments in their life too & then others will be making fun of them.
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Permalink Reply by Galena on
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I'm so sorry that you went through that Priya. When I'm not at work, I wear my bald look. What you describe sounds like the rare occassional scenes when people see the novel thing of a bald woman in public. I can't understand why you would get so much attention from wearing a wig? Is it cultural Priya? I've always wanted to know if a bald woman is more acceptable in India.
Keep your head up, it's your choice. I'm still learning how to live without my natural hair and it's a process. Keep coming here to AW where you have friends who understand when you need to vent. We stand in each other's corner for support and encouragement.
~Galena
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Hi Galena,
Wearing a wig is only acceptable for women who r models or actresses, in India. But, for a common woman, its very difficult to survive! People cannot imagine an Indian lady with no hair. They believe the longer the hair, more pretty is an Indian woman. So, if a woman doesnt have hair its a BIG loss & more serious prob than any other deadly diseases like cancer. They believe its IMPOSSIBLE for a woman to survive in the society without hair. They just cant accept a bald lady. So, being an alopecian woman is like a curse here. Everytime people will notice u r wearing a wig, it is certain u r going to hear sarcastic comments, stares & humiliation. It doesnt matter even if u r looking pretty in a wig.
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I'm learning so much from this discussion Priya. I assumed that the huge amounts of quality Indian hair in the marketplace meant that Indian people were comfortable with bald women. And then there are the religious reasons that an Indian woman would shave her head also. So you are disspelling a myth that I thought about the Indian culture. It's true that Indian women have beautiful hair, it's coveted for some of the finest hair pieces. I guess then it's a class issue? Only a poor Indian woman would shave her long hair for money? I empathize with you feeling trapped in what to do about reactions to your wig. In contrast, an African American woman in America would go totally unnoticed in a wig or hairpiece. We are one of the largest consumer groups for Indian hair pieces. Isn't that ironic? But stay strong Priya, you have recieved strength from amazing friends here, some who I credit for helping me through some dark days. We are here for you and we understand.
~G
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Permalink Reply by Andrea on
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Wow, that's awful. Perhaps you could say "Yes, with this wig I put food on the table of a whole family for a month. What have you done for India's poor?" Invariably anyone who would be so cruel to make snide remarks about a wig evidently to be heard is not someone who sees to the needs of the less fortunate. Of course, I am a believer in making people feel ashamed of themselves.
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U r absolutely rite Andrea,
THey should think that instead of making fun, have they helped someone who mite need it.
I would want to comment back at them now. Enough of ignoring it & swallowing this insult silently.
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Permalink Reply by Mary on
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So sorry to hear about these experiences, Priya. I'm afraid you have WAY more restraint than I do! I tend to confront people if they do something rude. I think if it happens again, you should wip off the wig, smile as big a smile as you can, and ask as politely as you can manage: "Do you have anything else to say?!" or "Do you have a question?!"
If you don't want to take the wig off (which I certainly understand), just look at them and say something like: "I have lost all my hair due to a medical condition. Do you have anything else to say?" or "Do you have a comment?"
Next time, let them have it, Priya! Keep your chin up and be proud of who you are. It's for these kind of people that I made a T-shirt that says "Yes, I'm bald...get over it!"
Mary
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Mary I saw one at www.butyoudontlooksick.com which says "My bald head is cuter than your bad haircut"
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HI Mary,
I appreciate ur boldness. But I still dont have the courage to pull off my wig in public coz it will make me more humiliated in front of them. Instead of realizing their mistake, they will think I am insane & make even more fun of me. People here dont realize with such sarcastic gestures back at them. Its better to give them angry looks or say directly to them "whats ur prob? Why r u making fun? Dont u have any ettiquittes?"
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