Days turn into weeks, weeks turn into months. I just can't understand why I am still here. I haven't seen my husband for 6 long months and I am almost at my breaking point now. Every morning I wake up alone and a realize once again that I must spend yet another day with out him. Every night I cry myself to sleep. No one understands. My family sees my cry, although I try to stay away when I cry. But, lately I have been crying nearly everyday. My own mother never offers any reason or comfort for me, she doesn't understand what it feels like to be away from the only man you love for such a long time. My 13 year old daughter is the only one who feels my pain. She misses her father probably more than I miss him. I don't see her cry, but maybe she only cries in her room where no one can see. But, she is the only one who offers me a hug. I can't hide my pain anymore. I am so upset that I have stopped eating and I don't want to go out of the house or talk to anyone. I do see my husband on web cam everyday, but it is not the enough for me. It just hurts more because I can't touch him, I can't kiss him. All I can do is stare at his face on the computer monitor and try to remember what it felt like to be in his arms and feel safe.
I am lost with out him. I have forgotten who I am. Nothing is the same.
I don't want anything... just a ticket to Mexico.
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