"The warped utopia that the modeling industry presents is a false representation of the 'average beauty.' Too often, young girls are internalizing the looks we see in magazines as 'what is beautiful' and, as a result, are endangering their health and lowering self-esteem. Despite attempts to 'change the modeling industry' the truth stands that what we define as 'beautiful' are the extreme looks represented by supermodels. There is no objective point of view on beauty in America, yet there appears to be 'standards' for what is considered to be beautiful.

As cliche-sounding as 'examining the stereotypes of beauty in America' is, my perspective on it is of a personal matter. Having been diagnosed with alopecia since I was seven years old, the question of external beauty has always puzzled me. Looking at fashion magazines, we perceive the extreme looks represented by supermodels as 'normal,' thereby creating low self-esteem within our minds that we ourselves are not beautiful. Though the phrase 'beauty is only skin deep' is often told to us as young children, it is difficult to accept when combated with a world of flawless models, actresses, entertainers, etc., and most tend to judge their own self-worth in comparison to the looks of the celebrities."
-research proposal, 04/25/08

This past spring in Humanities Core, our final project was the research paper that both intrigued and interested me and gave me a headache. When you're only given five weeks in one course to compile a complete research project along with all of the reading and exams also given to us, falling behind is to be expected. I came out of the project with a good solid B, and I'm happy with that. It was a tough assignment but I loved researching it.

The assignment was to choose a topic and write a research paper incorporating the three areas of the humanities which we learned about throughout the entire year: Thinking. Making. Doing. I knew immediately I wanted to incorporate something about alopecia in my project. The best research projects, they said, were the ones where we could write with a personal perspective. My obsession with America's Next Top Model factored into the equation immediately once the "plus sized" girl won during May's finale. Beauty in America, I decided, would be my topic.

I always took some time to read about the latest alopecia research in the NAAF newsletter and read websites online. But going so in depth into the study of beauty in America both fascinated and shocked me. It was rare to see looks that were "outside of the box" represented in mainstream media. And when a look that was different was shown, fanfare and announcements went with it. I thought back to how much mainstream media influenced my own thinking growing up, and I realize that it did. "Growing up with alopecia was difficult because when I looked at magazines such as Seventeen or Teen People, I never saw somebody who reflected the way I looked, or somebody who looked even remotely different - all of the models fit into the same category: Thin. Blonde. Tall. Caucasian," I wrote in my research paper. "NOt only did the mainstream media not have enough Asian representatives, I felt like having no hair, or even having short hair, made me ugly."

As I wrote my paper and my past began pouring onto the page, I felt an odd liberation. I had never shared those thoughts of my childhood with anyone. Sure, I wrote about alopecia and my own personal struggle for both NAAF's newsletter and my college admission essay, but I never thought about how deeply affected I was by the definition of beauty that the media had constructed. "As young girls, we are often told to embrace our inner beauty, yet it is a difficult campaign to accept when bombarded with images of the beauty stereotype built by the media's skewed representation of women. There is rarely an emphasis on building self-confidence in young girls to encourage them to embrace their inner beauty, which is far more important than external looks."

And I strongly believe in every word I wrote. How is it that some of the most beautiful people in the world - those with a true grasp on the words "inner beauty" - are ostracized by the beauty industry for an unconventional appearance? Seeing models like Anna Fitzpatrick and Alek Wek are inspiring and make me optimistic that maybe, one day, all of us who are scared to step out onto the streets without a wig will no longer have their confidence and self-esteem chipped away at by the intimidating images of the 6'2", size two model with gorgeous flowing blonde hair styled to perfection.

"Human is beautiful; perfect is boring." -Tyra Banks