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Comment by Paul O Keefe on March 10, 2011 at 1:03pm

Daniella you will find a man easily trust me, in your pics u are beautiful

Comment by Danielle Pace on July 2, 2010 at 6:41pm

Thanks lee, i will def take you up on that offer one day.

Comment by Lee on July 2, 2010 at 3:19am

I found my boyfriend right after I went totally bald. I dated many men when I had alopecia. I think one had a problem with it...and he was bald...go figure!! Anyways, I really do not htink men care about stuff like this. A lot of my guy friends forget I even have alopecia...it doesnt define me. Dont worry...your time will come, and when you need advise on how to tell them about it or whatever...dont be afraid to ask. ; )

Comment by Tallgirl on July 2, 2010 at 3:02am

The fun part is when the fear comes from actually, possibly, being SUCCESSFUL in a gentle communication! Don't be afraid to buy that ticket when the opportunity comes...you can't win if you don't play. Or so I have heard!

Comment by Danielle Pace on July 2, 2010 at 2:26am

thanks krissie and rachel, both comments were beautifully stated.

Comment by Krissie on July 2, 2010 at 2:13am

I agree with everything everyone has said. I too feel like there is no way someone could be attracted to me now. Dating and relationships seemed hard enough to handle, now we must fight against this. This thing that, of course, will win physically...but we must have faith and stay strong for ourselves. I think that hardest part is being able to continue loving urself and accepting this new aspect of u. WE have such a hard time seeing past it that we think OTHERS are just as put off by it as we are. But u know danielle, im so tired of feeling this way. I dont want this to scare me anymore. we don't have to do this to ourselves. ur a beautiful girl! don't ever think less of urself because of this. and if someone cant' love u because of ur hairloss, then f@#! them! they are just going to move on to someone else and judge the shit out of them for gaining weight, or some other crap! that man, or woman, is out there, and u will find that person when u least expect it. Just don't let this take a hold of u, it could cause u to miss that person. we will find our happily ever after...

Comment by Rachel on July 1, 2010 at 3:00am

When I got AA last october I sobbed into my boyfriends arms pretty much crying "how can you love me now?". Part of me had been thinking that the relationship wasn't heading where I wanted anyway but now the thought of rejection was overwhelming. If we did break up I don't know how I'd do dating. My bf has taken it like water off a ducks back - he listened to me cry for a couple weeks then just let me get on with it. He doesn't make a big deal out of it which helps I guess. I have a hairpiece and although that was proba a lik weird for him at first he's fine now. However I just found another patch, so I feel like I'm crumbling all over again. I can't be too bad hiding it though, guy I sit next to at work has no idea! He thought I'd dyed my hair, not got a hairpiece!

There is an innate fear of being rejected but I guess you can't expect anyone to love toy until you can accept yourself. We want empathy, not sympathy.

Zx

Comment by Danielle Pace on June 30, 2010 at 8:07pm

Trixie you took the words right out of my mouth, seems like you and i are on the exact same page. I for one think your beautiful but i know how hard it is these days to meet people who see the beauty in you despite alopecia. Everyone is so shallow and obsessed with looks these days. But this world is big, and hopefully, we will find someone who will love us for what and who we are. Lord knows i have so much love to give.

Comment by Trixie on June 30, 2010 at 4:54pm

I know how you feel. Most days I see my baldness as an obstacle when it comes to dating. I wear a wig but I have a fear of finding a someone connecting with them and once they find out I wear a wig things change and attraction gone. I know that someone that does that is not worth being with in the first place. I want to find someone that I am attracted to, that I attracted to me, and that's going to love me for me I don't want to feel like I am having to settle because I can't find anyone that I am attracted to that's attracted to me.

Comment by Norm on June 30, 2010 at 3:27pm

Hi Danielle, - look, all those comments above, about how "confidence is the thing", are totally spot-on. As a guy, to me, hair doesn't matter. Long, short, none - so what? The thing I look for is attitude, outlook, how you come across. If you can hold up a conversation, be witty, have ideas of your own, show you're intelligent .... that's what'll do it for me. The fact you're a millionairess with 5 Ferraris, 3 Porsches and a Ford (eh?) and a pad twice the size of Buckingham Palace doesn't come into it.... oh OK, maybe it helps a teensy-weensy bit ;)

You'll always come across people who just don't like "bald", the same as there are those who are turned off by other physical things (tell me there's nothing that'll put you off someone... bet you can't!) And equally, there are those who'll MOS DEF be into the bald thing. But in the main.... it's the attitude.... don't be defensive, apologetic, shy, shrinking. Be confident, exude charisma, love life!! How many bald babes do you see? Not too many, right? So make something of that fact.... you're EXOTIC! Use your baldness to your advantage! I did, when it wasn't cool for guys..... people thought it was ace! And look at me now!! (on second thoughts, don't.... :) )

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