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Awkward situations
So I'm having lunch with a few of my girlfriends sharing little anecdotes about our lives, as you do, when one starts to tell what happened at work. Now she's a nurse in an aged care facility and one old gentleman who has dementia has started doing strange things like peeing in corners of the room etc and he happens to wear a toupee. The toupee is getting more and more ragged looking and the nurses had been plotting on how to take it off him as he's pretty attached to it [no pun intended]. Now I'm listening to this and she's going on and on into detail of how hilarious it is that he won't part with it etc and I can feel the smile frozen on my face and wonder am I being overly sensitive to this story or what? Anyway, after she'd drizzled to a finish I laughed and said oh my god I hope I never end up in one of those places I wonder how I'll cope, please kill me before I go there! Subject changed immediately. But here's the thing...surely if someone was missing a limb amongst my friends I wouldn't relate a story of a one armed or one legged person and how I plotted with others to take away his tattered old prosthesis? Surely? Am I wrong here?
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Comment by LilyBell*Murphy'sLawLuvsMe on February 3, 2012 at 9:46am
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As I read you story Pat - it really upset me. It was very insensative of her to find it hilarious that he does not want to part with his hair piece. It seems wrong to laugh at someone who has dementia - just kinda mean spiritied. I took care of my sick Grandfather for several years and no matter how ill he became his apprarance still mattered to him - he liked to dress a certain way, have his hair trimed a certain way, etc.
This man thinks he looks good with his toupee, he is holding on to who he was - one day we will all be old - I hope nobody treats her the way she is treating him. And yes your analogy about the missing limb is dead on for me. My wig is an extension of me - I like how I look in hair, I present myself to the public with hair, if I end up in the same situation I hope someone will help me with my wig if I wish to wear it. Hell Pat I have already let it be known that I desire to be buried with my wig on!
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Comment by Pat on February 4, 2012 at 6:04am
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Yay!!! I'm booking in now!!
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Yes Rose make my reservation too!
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Comment by Michelle on February 8, 2012 at 11:30pm
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I don't think I would've been too bothered by the story. It was pretty funny. I just don't like when my friends feel like they can't talk about hair or anything that has to do with hair because they think I'll get my feelings hurt. Shoot, I still remember what it was like to have hair issues.
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That's one problem I dont have...my friends always talk about their hair! I think they forget I don't have any :)
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Comment by Cindie on March 13, 2012 at 10:14am
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Hair stories make me uncomfortable. Because generally when they are told around me, someone inevitably looks at me and says something like, "but you can't relate, can you?" And then I have to go into "ugly-defensive mode", and I don't like that.
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Yeh that's the worse, when others tippy toe around the subject. Personally I like it to be acknowledged or shown some sensitivity without going the route of avoiding mentioning anything about hair altogeher. I guess it's a fine line for some.
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