Comment by Tallgirl on September 17, 2012 at 3:29am

You have a point. Throughout history, hair must have been an endless free source of interest and fascination to young women. As a tomboy, however, I found that running, making forts and zip lines with the guys, having water-balloon fights, catching tadpoles, caterpillars and frogs, creating a neighborhood newspaper and growing a garden were more fascinating to me. The hair thing even didn't matter as much in high school, due to clubs, art, camping and travel. I wonder how women entertained themselves in the days of wearing those middle-ages cone hats (hennens?), or now in countries with head covers?

I stopped letting my older cousin comb my long hair when alopecia started (me: 10, her: 15). I do not know if my aunt told her why, and I certainly didn't want to tell. What did I end up having to share at sleepovers? Beatles' and other music, of course! Music, ultimately, becomes the great unifier from 6th to 10th grades. After that, it was all about the ability to drive!

How about this one: At least we still have music and dance!

Comment by Starshine on September 17, 2012 at 5:46am

I agree. I am so tired of my family telling me it is just hair and I look fine, even though I am wearing a hair piece. They continue to act like I am totally fine, while inside I am totally not fine. people dont seem to know how to deal with it, so they choose to ignore it and just go on as if everything is normal. It would be nice to have someone to really talk to who really understood how devastating this is.

Comment by Casey on September 17, 2012 at 10:11am

It can be a devastating thing, and you should feel no shame in being upset. You will find a whole mix of women and men on here- some who like you are still upset, and others who have reached acceptance. Dont feel bad if you arent there yet or even if you never get there. The experience is different for everyone, but I dont think any person started off the process thinking "oh boy, bald spots!".

I had a friend who was in a horrible car accident and she got scars all over her face, effectively ending her modeling career. People kept telling her "at least you are alive" and she hated it. yes, she was alive and healthy, but that didnt mean it didnt hurt to look in the mirror.

I wish I had some advice for dealing with alopecia, but I dont. For me, I just slowly came to accept it as part of my life. I get sad sometimes, but there are a lot of other things to worry about and I dont focus on it. Life has turned out pretty good, regardless of my hair!

Comment by Trisha on September 17, 2012 at 12:31pm

Thank you all for the support :)

Comment by BTB (John) on September 18, 2012 at 4:28am

Hair loss is a devastating loss to any woman especially is our society that puts such importance on attractiveness. Sure things can be worse etc etc but its not you have lost your hair and should be able to grieve that loss without feeling guilty that you have not lost a breast or a limb. A woman bald is an oddity in our society while male pattern baldness is acceptable and is not a painful experience on the same level as alopecia. Never let anyone tell a woman it no big deal because it is.

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