How to deal with this?!

I have no idea. I wish I knew. My friends don't understand. All I hear is "its just hair". I hate hearing that. I know its just hair. I know I should be grateful that their is nothing seriously wrong with my child, that he is still healthy. But I'm angry and sad. I want to know how to get past the anger and the sadness and learn to live with the fact that my child might lose all of his hair. I want to look at him and just see him and not see the new hair loss. Not feel that pit of my stomach flip flop when I see that another day means its that much thinner. I want to look at him and not think of his hair loss and not wonder when today is the day that the rest of it will go. I want to have a day of thinking about something else. I want to have all the right words to tell him this is happening and to be able to comfort and help him through this. How can I do all that when I can't do it for myself. I'm failing myself and my child.

Views: 7

Comment by Donna DeHoog on September 3, 2009 at 12:08pm
Jennifer if it helps I totally understand what you are going through. It is not my child. it is me. I am told all the time that I have a head full of hair. Yes I still have hair but it is nothing compared to what I had just 8 months ago. Enough about me, have you seen a dermatologist in your area for your child's hair loss? They can do a biopsy of his scalp and determine the cause and begin treatment. Treatment in my case consists of a foam I apply to my head daily and injections into my scalp every 3 months. Unfortunately it is not working in my case. My hair loss is due to hormonal problems vs alopecia totalis. My dermatologist has stated he has seen the treatment help in a lot of cases. Good luck...I hope this helps! I totally understand your feelings of angry and sadness! I too get the response it is just hair...no its not! WIth my hair loss...I feel like I am losing a part of myself. I will pray for you and your child, Jennifer! Take care!
Comment by Jennifer on September 3, 2009 at 12:55pm
We have seen 2 derms, and they both say its not a big deal that he isn't going to lose all his hair, that its fairly common in children because their immune system is so young and underdeveloped. But I'm his mother. I know what I see each day. I know that his hair is thinning in front of our eyes. I called the doc and asked for her to see him again, that I want some tests run. She has no idea what tests to run she said, but that she would do some research before we made it back in. So now I guess I need to do more research so I can tell her exactly what tests I want run.

The sad part is, I blame myself for this. In my opinion his alopecia was brought on by stress. We have had a lot of change going on here the last year and he is such a worry wart. I didn't realize that he was this stressed out until the 2nd patch appeared recently and I had to reflect. I wish I could undo it all. :(
Comment by Laura on September 3, 2009 at 8:43pm
Dont blame youreself. You did what you had to do, It was not your fault. Stress is not the only cause for alopecia. It has alot to do with genetics. Support your son. That is what you need to do is support him. Tell him that it is ok. There is absolutly nothing wrong with having Alopecia.

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