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Comment by Scaredandhopeful on May 29, 2010 at 5:28am

Dear lovely person who wrote this post
We travel this road of life at our own pace with our own circumstances. Some are easier than others.
You are not pitiful at all but brave for even doing the things you do, no doubt doing many of these things with fear in your heart. This takes you so so so so so far away from being a coward. If you compare yourself to others you'll either feel vain or inadequate and really neither is true. Be gentle with yourself and realise you are doing the best you can. The others will come if they are something you want to make happen. Baby steps. Always one foot and then the other
Good luck

Comment by pat j madden on May 28, 2010 at 10:19pm

Hey Roslyn my name is Pat,
I dont comment on much here because im usually negative and keep my opinions to myself, but anyway. I also appreciate that its supposed to be easier for a fella and it is in some cases but not all(i cant go to the changing rooms , which cuts out a major slice of a lads social circle). About the going out thing, i myself cant get used to going out without a cap unless im on hols or somewhere where no one knows me.I dont know if this is the nicest thing to say but its my experience anyway .
People are always going to look and stare it's a biological reaction to something out of the ordinary,they cant help it,you have to learn to be a step ahead of the reaction (which does take practice) ,force a smile,give a quick affirmation that its not cancer only alopecia and then put up with the sorrowful looks all night. what i find is after the initial kneejerk reaction people do just get used to looking at you and get on with their own set of problems..and find someone else to comment about.As far as everyone else here looking carefree,look at their eyes and you'll see that their burden has taken a toll,their isn't one person here who wouldn't prefer to have hair.Gain confidence from the fact that the mountain that you've had to climb to get to this point is higher than most which already makes you an emotionally stronger person than most. Maybe this is a bit harsh and might be better coming from woman but for me i had to toughen up and alter my personallity to deal with aholes(if some1 was staring i would approach and ask are you all right there ,do you have a question about my lack of hair ,which leaves most people stuttering).
Ill leave you with this, YOU ARE NOT pitiful ,you are human ,just coping with something that makes us feel a bit like an island because its not societies norm.Who wouldn't feel bad about this crap ,having to bear it for no apparant reason .just know there are others coping ,somehow .So be strong and Keep your proper friends and family close and try to be more pos than neg.

A stranger struggling

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