Alopecia World
www.alopeciaworld.com
My over-50-years-of-alopecia
When a local, low-cost basement hairdresser on my street noticed the quarter-sized bald spot, I was about 10. I pulled my long hair back over the spot, so no one ever knew in 5th grade.
When alopecia reared up again my sophomore year in high school, I got a fall (half wig), and again pulled hair from the forehead back over the matching wig, and secured my hair onto the fall with a large barrette. Large bobby pins held my fall onto my real hair, twisted underneath. No one knew. I did the same with a longer wig of real Korean hair for my formal dances. My real friends were from camp, and they lived in MANY cities in my state. I had a great time going to camp, conferences, traveling with them. At school, I joined many clubs, went to concerts, did the art for drama club.
When more bald spots appeared at the hairline, I got a full-head keneculon (sp) wig. No one knew. I wore this wig and the others through 2 years of college, and wore scarves or granny-caps (in style then) to bed in my dorm. Maybe I told my roommate...I don't even remember. I did my hair in the privacy of the bathroom. No big deal. I wore wigs on my dates. At 18, a dear guy (old church camp friend) told me baldness doesn't change love...and believed for the first time since age 10 that marriage may be in my future.
In college, I stopped the shots and prednisone, and my hair actually grew back. I got a Jane Fonda shag haircut and partied down at a fraternity mixer, proud to be wearing my own hair. I was about 20. Much more wine and beer were in my life, but less stress (being away from my parents)! Is wine the secret tonic? Ha ha.
Hair grew in and I made up for lost time in my 20s, moved to California, traveled, created art, started a Master's Degree...then got married (age 31) and had children. Neither kid ever had alopecia.
Hung around dogs, horses, an impossible mother-in-law and maybe a change in water at a country property. Husband and job scene, finances all became stressful. Started birth control pills. Oooops! Alopecia returned, went to totalis, universalis, then totalis. Husband left with the long-haired younger secretary after 15 years of marriage. No big loss...but head hair never really returned. At 47, alopecia was the least of my worries: I had one kid starting junior high and one starting high school, while the ex defaulted on child support. I did, however, start dating an old beau (who used to date me with hair when I was age 28-30) 10 months after my ex left. Yes, I was bald this time around!
My grandson doesn't have alopecia (he is now 10). However, he just got asthma, which is in the gene group with alopecia. I have also learned that 2 distant relatives alive now and possibly my toupee-wearing great grandpa have/had alopecia. Now I know where I got it. I still work, enjoy friends, go to events, shop, live. There are now TWO men who do not mind my baldness, and long-haired one who is trying to contact me long distance, even though he is married. Go figure. My age now? Nearing 62. Will I ever meet a person who wants to settle down with me as family? Not sure, but I do not spend my days whining about it. I get dressed and go to work, watch grandson's sports games, and cook nice meals for myself.
Stop griping and start living. You young 'uns have SOOOOOOO many more years to go, countries to see, jobs to try, college to complete, children and adults to enjoy, art to create. I want to hear/see your FUNNY alopecia challenges, witty comebacks, creative head gear photos, new romances, new businesses, etc. Every blog I write here is aimed at making others think, gain insight, smile, nod or find latest research. What are you giving to AlopeciaWorld, especially the children and teens, when all you do is whine and gripe? Be a part of what helps us all, and you may even help yourself. Think about how you sound, to us, yourself, your partner, your boss and coworkers, your potential dates. Think about the hopelessness you present to fragile, worried children, spouses, best friends and parents (who are NOT as informed or in touch with this baldness thing) when you obsess and cry constantly. This alienates them. There is a part of you that can still be a strong family member, listener, friend. I want to meet THAT part of you.
As to information...do you realize how many hundreds of discussions, groups, videos and blogs are already on here to answer your question? Go see the monthly archives! You will be surprised!
-
Comment by Norm on September 11, 2014 at 12:17pm
-
Hmmm..... this blog post, and all its comments, is far too positive and upbeat compared to the usual efforts on here these days. Don't you lot realise your lives are supposed to be empty and meaningless because of alopecia? Can't you see your futures contain nothing but misery, depression and loneliness, according to some?? I demand you all cease and desist immediately, or you might start having a beneficial influence on those here who revel in their victimhood! Haven't you considered how miserable they'd be if they were happy????? (er....)
Still, if you insist on continuing in this vein (as vampires like to do), I suggest the only option is to get down to Tallgirl's place this weekend for the Big Boozy Baldy Party, where we can drink lots, talk rubbish and fall over in a heap while laughing uncontrollably. (She doesn't know about it yet, but we can surprise her.) Who's up for it? :)
-
Comment by Tallgirl on September 11, 2014 at 7:22pm
-
Oh, Norm...I only drink water and milk, don't you know? (Right.) However, my birthday IS just around the corner: I need a PAR-TAY!!! Think y'all can actually catch me home during youth football, grape harvest and Oktoberfest season? Go forth, ye all, and SIEZE THE DAY!
-
Comment by MJ Wrick on September 11, 2014 at 8:47pm
-
Okay- if we all toss our "hair" and get loaded, wouldn't it be funny to see who ended up with who's "hair"?? Oh, there are no limits to my demented sense of humor... (I, who enjoy the look on the faces of those poor kids at the barber college when I go in to get my head reshaved and then plop in the chair and yank my wig off- that is, those who don't pass out............).
-
Comment by Barbara on September 11, 2014 at 9:06pm
-
Tall Girl, you made my day! I've had alopecia for over 42 years and most people don't know and if they "think" I wear a wig they never ask. They like me for me. You need to blog more because it will help so many people who have alopecia and need to hear someone who is so "uplifting". Thank you!
-
Comment by Debs on September 12, 2014 at 5:17am
-
Nice one, I love your positive attitude, I agree completely with your philosophy of life. Hair loss has not stopped me living my life to the full. Just live your post. X
-
-
TG, it doesn't matter whether you're home or not.... just leave the key under the mat and we'll start without you. Should be really rocking by the time you get back :)
MJW - luuuurrrrve that image of you at the barber's.... and it's really good of you to help all those college peeps pass out. Although maybe not in the way they imagined when they signed up, haha! :) :)
-
-
MJ, maybe we can play Virtual Trade and name whose wig we wish we owned...or whose bald look we wish we could rock! Lots of compliments could ensue...
-
Comment by janetparsons on September 16, 2014 at 7:45pm
-
I am 40 yearswith alopecia universals, I havesince developed fibromyalgia, and chronic back problemns, in constant pain as I typei am 60 yr old grandmother, andi fight hard every day to get what I can out of life, thanks so much for your inspiration,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, janet from newfoundland.
-
Comment by Jane on September 26, 2014 at 2:12pm
-
Thank you for your inspiring post,I have had AU now for 47 years and I have had a full , active and good life and I guess my hairloss took me on a long journey of self discovery and learning. So I am grateful for all that I have experienced. I do feel though that in the first few years people really need to be able to express and be heard and supported in the process of adapting to loss and change. When I was young there was so little understanding and now this website for instance is an amazing resource and support. As you grow older you see all the varied and often extreme life circumstances that people cope with very bravely. By comparison hair loss is rather minor. So thank you and all best wishes .
-
-
Those who thought of dropping in for a party, be forewarned that I have dizziness, a bad cough and laryngitis. Well, the dizzy part you all knew, and the voiceless part you're thinking, "FINALLY"! The cough part, however, may be catchy. Send nice comments instead!
Comment
- ‹ Previous
- 1
- 2
- 3
- 4
- Next ›
© 2024 Created by Alopecia World.
Powered by
You need to be a member of Alopecia World to add comments!
Join Alopecia World