Alopecia World
www.alopeciaworld.com
Other women's reaction to my alopecia
So a couple of women came along as visitors to my Toastmaster's meeting the second time in a row. At this meeting I was wearing a new wig and both of them commented on my new look...actually the style is pretty much the style I always wear but the colour was much darker...so I said matter of factly that I was wearing my new wig and explained I had alopecia. They both said they would never know it was a wig and that if I didn't tell anyone no one would know. Just then the meeting was called to order so the opportunity to explain that although I wore a wig I wasn't into keeping it a secret was lost. Shame really. However, I've had a few comments from people I just meet who comment on my hair that I shouldn't tell anyone...strange..and it makes me wonder if women feel a little uneasy about another woman losing her hair? I've never had that reaction from a man although maybe that's because most men don't comment on a woman's hair? lol Just thought it was an interesting experience to share.
-
Comment by Lace on December 15, 2012 at 12:08am
-
I tell too. It's not an issue; I'm not ashamed of it, and I'm not trying to hide anything. Actually, today, at my company's Holiday party, someone who I don't see very often (she works at a suburban office) mentioned my wig. I wasn't fazed. I'm just glad there are solutions out there that allow us to live our lives fully and with grace.
-
Comment by Pat on December 16, 2012 at 4:39am
-
Absolutely!
-
Comment by Christine on December 17, 2012 at 9:24pm
-
Pat, this has always been a struggle for me, too. I like to let people know. It takes away me wondering if they figured out I am wearing a wig. I am so tired of hiding and tired of living my life in fear of what others will say or think of me. I recently started wearing scarves to work and it's been interesting. I have been approached only by a couple of people. Some people think I have cancer & going through chemo. I take every opportunity I can to set them straight and educate them on alopecia. I have universalis so that makes me only 1% of the population.
Not sure if other women feel uneasy knowing of my lack of hair. They should feel blessed - makes me not want to take anything for granted.
-
Comment by AEA0090 on December 17, 2012 at 9:34pm
-
Hello Pat!
I think that in a our society many people base a lot of worth on looks. ESPECIALLY for women. I know that when I started loosing my hair at 16, it was my greatest fear come true. I think when people see us or hear about our alopecia it shows that this can happen to anyone- that it can happen to them. It shows their vulnerability. I think people just don't know how to handle it! I think by you showing your strength and being truthful about your alopecia is the best thing, good for you!
-
Comment by Lili Añel (aka Eulalia) on December 18, 2012 at 12:02pm
-
I have let people know, and they happen to be predominantly women about my alopecia. Yes its always a comment about my hair if I was wearing a wig. When I say "thank you, its a wig". They'll say why do you wear wigs, and I explain about my alopecia. 99.99% of them have never heard about alopecia. I usually tell them instead of saying "thank you" after they've complimented my wig (unknowingly) because I will eventually show up without the wig. I am met with a similar response to yours. They'll say "oh, you shouldn't tell anyone" and after I say "well, I may not wear a wig one day" they all look horrified and then say "oh I would NEVER do that" and I follow it with "well, I do; its way more comfortable and I like my bald head". Ultimately after I show up bald most will say "wow, you look great" or "you're lucky you can wear any wig you want, be whomever you want, I'd like that". Its the ones that don't comment that make your life hell; who talk behind your back, who, are usually in positions of power, supervisors, managers, and then, after the day I show up without a wig, life changes. It is what it is.
-
-
Lili I don't go out without my wig so unless someone comes to my home and sees me bald [and sometimes not even then as I wear my wig most days]. I agree most women can't imagine being bald and it frightens them...hell it terrified me :-) As I have worked with my husband for many years I've never had to deal with managers etc on a day to day basis so in my case I've been very lucky. I don't know how I would have handled that especially if they weren't supportive!
-
Comment by Ken on December 19, 2012 at 9:39am
-
I'm a man with AU, and I know more difficult for a woman, but I have the same experiences. Men will ask me how I keep my head shaved so perfectly. Sometimes women have asked me why pluck my eyebrows. What else would I say except that I have alopecia? Then there is an awkward moment where I feel compelled to tell them I'm ok, not terminal, and they say "If you didn't say anything no one would even know, I'm sorry, I should mind my own business", etc... So even though I'm comfortable telling people and explaining alopecia, I am still left feeling like it's something I should keep hidden.
-
-
Yes that's it exactly Ken, you hit the nail on the head! Like its something we should keep hidden...
-
Comment by Mama Parsinc on December 22, 2012 at 9:58am
-
You know why should you have to explain everything to people...family yes of course, close friends, possibly, but everyone else...why do they need to know or why do they need to be told? It is a persons's choice to disclose the fact they wear a wig but no one should ever feel that they have to. Unless a person has experienced Hairloss they really have no clue and then you discover something that makes you look like you have a regular head of hair....and you tell them that it's a wig. I'm not saying its something that should be hidden but why do we have to tell others? We don't owe it to them.
-
-
You know why should you have to explain everything to people...family yes of course, close friends, possibly, but everyone else...why do they need to know or why do they need to be told? It is a persons's choice to disclose the fact they wear a wig but no one should ever feel that they have to. Unless a person has experienced Hairloss they really have no clue and then you discover something that makes you look like you have a regular head of hair....and you tell them that it's a wig. I'm not saying its something that should be hidden but why do we have to tell others? We don't owe it to them.
© 2024 Created by Alopecia World.
Powered by
You need to be a member of Alopecia World to add comments!
Join Alopecia World