I have trichotillomania, and god I wish I could just pretend that I didnt.
It hurts so badly to finally admit that rather then this being done to you, its you doing it to yourself. and that there is nothing worse then losing friends over this.

I'm married, I love my husband and my one year old daughter. but its not enough, I want friends. but I'm alone.
I have to wear wigs, and I finally put myself in debt and decided to go to a hair restoration clinic to try and help me. but as I said before, now I'm in debt.

I've tried to make friends, and eventually they all ask the same thing. "Why do you wear wigs?" Or "Why are you always wearing a hat?" And I've decided that it's not healthy for me to lie anymore, blaming this on "alopecia" rather then "trichotillomania" was just a way for me to pretend I don't have a problem.

And so I tell them. "I have Trichotillomania, It's an uncontrollable urge to pull your hair out, it usually happens to be in my sleep. and it leaves me with big bald spots that over time become impossible to cover up without the use of a hat or wig."

Then they do "the face" that face that people do when they don't really believe you at first, and then they do and they look like you just told them that you like to eat insects for protein.

Usually its followed by an "oh..." then a quick wrap up of everything you'd been talking about and an adios. They never call or text you again. I had one person that called me crazy. "You are crazy! Are you getting psychological help? like taking lithium or anything?"

You have no idea how much that stung.
But I know its how people feel, they think I'm crazy. insane. impossible to help. god it burns.
I'm not crazy.. please don't think I'm crazy...
I feel like that kid in the corner that just wants friends.
I know I'm weird, that I'm different.. but I'm nice, and like things, and shop and enjoy life just like any of you.. can't that be enough?

Even some friends I made that had alopecia called me crazy, asked me why I was grouping myself with them. I thought we all had virtually the same problem, and that I could find friends through them, and their group.

But no, so far I've just been heart broken.