Comment by Diane on April 15, 2010 at 12:40pm

Mary, I think you handle it the right way! Kids are curious that's it.... adults are too but they don't ask...

And by the way, kids in restaurant are fine!! it's their parents who bring them to inappropriate places and/or at inappropriate time and/or parents that are too permissive that are to blame dont' you think?

Comment by Sarah Car on May 13, 2010 at 11:49am

I have only recently started going out totally bald again so I haven't experienced this as an adult. But when I was a kid with lots of bald spots other kids were really cruel. I don't remember this particular incident, but my mom tells a story about this time we were at the beach and some older boys were making fun of me. They were probably saying things like ew thats gross, or something to that effect because I turned around and said "yeah and its contagious too!" and pushed them into the waves. I think that story is funny now, but I am sure at the time I was hurt.

But most of the time I fall back on the allergic response. It is really the simplest way to explain it to kids and adults alike.

Comment by ILA on May 17, 2010 at 8:45am

It depends on the situation. I have had kids that flat out ask and then I have had kids that stare and laugh. To the kids that have asked I simply tell them that God made me differently and I have a condition that stops my hair from growing. I tell them it's okay because I am used to it now and as long as I am healthy I can buy hair if I want, lol. To the kids that laugh and stare (typically older kids) I say " I hope you never have to go through loosing your hair like I did" and they usually stop and put there head down in shame. You never know at any given moment how your going to react. I want to say I have never been nasty but that isn't the case it has happened.

Comment by Dotty on May 18, 2010 at 1:46pm

When I first lost my hair, I was running a home daycare with children from 2 to 10. I lost all my hair in 3 months. I was very upset not knowing what was happening and I hated looking in the mirror so I immediately got a wig because I knew that if I scared myself by my reflection in the mirror, then what would I do to these children? I did tell them that something was going on with my body and it was making my hair fall out and they accepted that explanation thoroughly. They thought it was cool that I could change my hair color and style every day if I wanted to. We had dress up days that all the children would try on my wigs and have a great laugh. As my acceptance grew, so did the information I shared with the children. I got brave enough to show them my bald head and they thought it was wonderful. I really hated the wigs but because I felt that I needed to make everyone around me feel comfortable, I continued to wear them. I found an Alopecia support website that completely turned my life around. The more I talked to them, the more I felt that I was hiding who I was. I decided to ditch the wigs and just wore bandanas and baseball caps. The stares and questions about how sick I was (Cancer assumption), got to be too much so I decided to do something drastic like tattoo my whole head!!!! It was the best thing I ever did for myself. Now, I hardly ever wear anything on my head and the stares and questions are mostly positive and when people ask the #1 question "Did that hurt?" I can say with all self confidence and surety...."Not as much as losing my hair did!!!" I get to tell them all about Alopecia, those people who used to stare and were afraid to ask, feel more comfortable about asking me about my tattoos than feeling sorry and not asking anything. Kids included!!! They think it's really cool :) I use the allergic line to the kids and it always works. Kids have always been much easier to deal with than teens and adults. They are just curious and when they see that it doesn't bother me, then it doesn't phase them either. The older ones are the cruel ones and when I come accross the occasional rude ones, I always tell them that it can happen to anyone at any age and they should pray that Karma doesn't come visit them and take their hair away!!! They are always embarrassed and walk away ashamed as they should be!!! I can honestly say that I don't even notice if people are even looking in my direction anymore, it's usually the people I am with that notice!! LOL I've come a long way in 9 years!!!

Comment by Mary on May 18, 2010 at 3:51pm

Right on, Dotty!

So far, my only tattoos are on my eyes, but I've found the same thing...if I'm just who I am, adults and children mostly take it in stride, tell me it looks nice, or ignore it.

Comment by Vinichuk Oksana on July 6, 2010 at 1:18pm

Я своей дочери и её друзьям давным давно просто сказала: я не знаю почему у меня нет волос... их просто нет... и все..Им этого оказалось достаточно
I am his daughter and her friends had long since said simply: I do not know why I have no hair ... they simply do not ... They all .. it was enough

Comment by Patricia on July 14, 2010 at 1:02am

I was a preschool teacher for a number of years. Although I wear wigs and my student never saw my bald head, one observant little boy noticed that I don't have eyebrow hair...I drawn mine on with eyebrow powder. We went through a similar line of questions and answers...no I'm not sick, I just don't have hair. Eventually when the why's continued and I was out of answers. I told him that I was made with no eye brow hair and he was made with blond hair. That's just how we were put together. That satisfied him.

Children amaze me everyday with their ability to see differences and ask questions to understand, not to judge. Genuine curiosity is a beautiful thing!

Comment by Mary on July 14, 2010 at 1:07am

Great response! Thanks.

Comment by Petra on July 14, 2010 at 1:48pm

This week I went with my sister to pick up my nephew from pre-school. About the only time I ever wear a wig anymore is when I go to work, the rest of the time I wear a scarf. So, here we are in his class, ages 3-4 year olds, and this little girl comes up to me and says "Hi, Why do you have a scarf on your head?" The teacher is looking at me and I did not know what to say. I had a quick vision of telling her I don't have any hair and all the kids start screaming :-) So I just told her that just like sometime's she might wear a barrette in her hair I'm wearing a scarf. This seemed to satisfy her since she then had to show me her toothbrush.
Of course non of this would of happened if her mom would of told her to never ever ever talk to stangers....just kidding. She was a cute confident, curious child.

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