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Afraid to have kids
I know there are much worse things that can be passed on to children, but a part of me is rather scared to have kids because I hate knowing I may pass on my AA. Anyone else have these fears?
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Emory on
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My AU came on suddenly 6 months after having my son. So I was not in your position. However, I completely understand where you are coming from. I am sure others can attest to this, but having kids is such an amazing thing, I wouldnt let the fear of AA stop you from doing it. I was more concerned that I would have problems getting pregnant for the 2nd time but I'm actually in my 4th month and everyone is doing fine. The pediatrician reassured me that the chance of passing alopecia along is very low. As a cancer surgeon, I can tell you there are a lot scarier things that can happen than hair loss. It's normal to be anxious but I wouldn't hesitate for a second if having children is what you really want.
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Permalink Reply by Kimberly on
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Alopecia started for me 3 months after the birth of my first child....6 years later I had my second child. I would say that too had crossed my mind, but not enough to keep me from the blessing of having children. Neither of my children have alopecia and both have a thick head of hair.
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Permalink Reply by Karen Smith on
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As a mom that doesn't have AA or know of it on either side I have wondered how we passed that gene on to my daughter. As painful as this condition is the world is a better place because she is in it. I would definately have her again even though she got the gene. By the way she is a happy camper, loves kids and plans on having plenty.
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Permalink Reply by Silk on
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Statistical rick of having alopecia areata in children of parents with AA is about 20%. It can be a difficult individual decision to make, though, since we know how much suffering hair loss entails and do not want to expose our children to this. My personal observation is that people who have relatives with alopecia often take it less hard than those without family history of hair loss.
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Permalink Reply by Heather on
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I told my self that I wasn't going to have children because I have AU and I have had it for over 11 years now....I got pregnant in 2009...I was on Birth Control but I was sick and was on Antibiotics....Well Antibiotics covers up your Birth Control and making the Birth Control not work....So low and be-hold my husband and I have a Beautiful 3 year old....And now from trying 11 months we also have a 9 month old....And my daughter has a beautiful head of hair!!....I do worry about it on a day to day basis but I know that I shouldn't...My daughter is HAPPY and Healthy and that's all I ask for....=)...
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Permalink Reply by Ulli on
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Same here. No family history of AA or any other type of hairloss. Both my granddads had heads full of still dark hair when they died. So it's hard to imagine it's genetical.
My son is 11 now and recently asked me if he would get it too someday. I told him no because I don't want him to worry and maybe stress himself into AA someday.
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Permalink Reply by holyhairlossbatman!! on
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It's only natural what you are feeling. I totally get it because AA does cause potentially a lifetime of effects that could be horrible. Or not. It does really depend on the person. THe only thing that I can tell you that could be helpful is that each of us at some time in our lives has some sort of "thing." For some people, they appear unscathed until old age and then they fall apart at their thing. Other people get even a childhood life threatening illness. But we all get these lessons to learn for some reason. I know that is just my opinion, so disregard if you don't like it, but I'm going to share anyway, ok?
I got physical disability in my early 20s that forever changed my life. Then I had a child whose Father had a serious mental illness that he passed on to her (he did not disclose this illness to me and deliberately hit it while we were dating), so she got that along with autism on top of it. Ouch. It stinks but it's not the end of the world. It's something we deal with every day, but it's not the sum of our entire lives. I guess the point that I want to make to you by telling you about this is that YOU have special things to give to the world. I don't want to be a jerk, but I want to say that there are a lot of people out there that aren't particularly giving a lot of good stuff to the world that are having MANY kids. Your AA is inconsequential when compared to the gifts that you give the world and then gifts that your children could give the world. Please just think about that. After you are gone, do you want a very special potentially bald child out there doing great things or do you want that child not to exist just because they might have AA?
My own child was the one that brought my hair loss to my attention (talk about denial).LOL She DOES worry that she will have hair loss and does have one small area that IS bald. She copes with this I think by being totally in love with wigs. She has her own she "plays" with and even wears out in public. They are all in cool colors and funky styles and as she hits her teen years she wants funny colored hair. I've told her I'd buy her all the blue wigs she wants in lieu of dye. She LOVES hair and wants to be a hairdresser and when she is older she wants to wear wigs EITHER way because she finds them playful. Best of luck on whatever you decide.
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Permalink Reply by Sunflower25 on
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She is too cute. :)
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