Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Dom on December 29, 2012 at 6:50pm

Hi Pat,
I wish people with AU could fast forward a few years and REALISE, nothing PHYSICAL has changed or ever wiLl!!!!!!! ( if you are AU)
Just be content and bald or miserable and bald.
I still would like my hair back but it's NEVER coming BACK!!!
I have 8 years to prove it and AU. AU never grows back.

PARTIal regrowth is alopecia lol

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Permalink Reply by Pat Crotty on December 29, 2012 at 7:08pm

Any thoughts on what can assist people to fast forward to that end point of living their life as they would like despite AA/AT/AU??
It would be so helpful to have some 'teachable' strategies.
Pat

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Permalink Reply by chris for hair on December 29, 2012 at 7:52pm

1 Understand that self pity is not attractive and will not make others feel sorry for us.
2. Compare your issues to those that live with cancer, intractable pain, other devastating conditions that can't allow the victims to lead normal lives.
3. Understand that we are all different and the World wood be so boring if we were all the same.
4. Know that you have your answers inside and no one else can give them to you.
5. Spend time each day in gratitude for the good in your life.
6. Get away from focusing on you and focus on something that makes you feel good.
7. Do not allow negative self talk.PERIOD
8. Get a pet. Love and cherish it and give it the best life possible.
9. Go outside and enjoy the miracle of nature.
10. Keep working on self acceptance, you will get there. Everything in life worth having takes time and work.

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Permalink Reply by anna ricci on December 29, 2012 at 9:58pm

A big thank you to you who encourage me! I had my debut wearing a wig every day. I feel another person and myself with a wig. I began my work on January 3. I think you have, I'll be strong!

Thank you! :)

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Permalink Reply by Zoe on January 1, 2013 at 3:20am

Hi Dom and everyone else

Of course in a way you are absolutely correct Dom however Alopecia can scar a person and as we are not all the same we wont all react the same to this life changing event. I praise your strength. It's not just that we are/have lost our hair its also the fact that we find it hard to see ourselves without it. It can easily bring on depression.

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Permalink Reply by Lexi on December 29, 2012 at 9:31pm

Good luck on your new job. It will all be ok, and work out for you. Just hold your head up high and whatever you choose, wig or no wig, the choice is yours, and it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks or says. This is YOUR life. No one else's. Easy to give that advice, but I know not so easy to fully take the advice. Be strong.

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Permalink Reply by anna ricci on December 29, 2012 at 9:58pm

A big thank you to you who encourage me! I had my debut wearing a wig every day. I feel another person and myself with a wig. I began my work on January 3. I think you have, I'll be strong!

Thank you! :)

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Permalink Reply by Natasha Gehrke on January 4, 2013 at 9:46am

I started losing my hair when I was four. My family spent my childhood pretending there was nothing wrong. If I asked about it or tried to talk to my grandmother, who raised me, she would tell me to stop talking. It made all of them uncomfortable. At 13 all my hair fell out and they couldn't ignore it anymore. I spent my whole life trying to figure out how to deal with it. At times it was hard and I couldn't look in the mirror. Last summer after injections and medications the doctor told me that I have the form of Alopecia that reoccurs the most and is the most resistant to treatment. It broke my heart. I was used to having bald spots and the looks people gave me but there was always the hope that it would grow back and that hope got me through a lot. At that point I had to find a new way to cope. My friends and family supported me, and while I tried to stay strong my family was breaking down for me.
I've been through a lot in my life and most of it had little to do with my hair. After lost friendships and broken relationships I realized that I was worth more. My hair isn't just something that I need to deal with, the people around my need to deal with the loss and repercussions of my hair. I've been harassed in school, in my social life, and at work because I am a bald women. I've been called a freak, unattractive, yelled at because people thought that I was pretending to have cancer, and have had people insist to me that I must be a lesbian. Children I went to school with were mean but adults can be ever meaner. I have been without hair so long that my friends identify me by my lack of. When my hair grew back my friends wanted me to cut it off because they felt that I wasn't me with my hair.
My hair is what people identify me with. When someone walks up to me and asks if I lost a fight with a pair of scissors I laugh and tell them that I didn't even see them coming. I was engaged at 19. The first thing my ex-finance said was to ask me how long it took to get my hair like 'that' when I was completely bald. I told him three hours and a can of hairspray. I refuse to let people use my hair to bring me down because in the end no one has the right to power over me because I'm different.
Sometimes I still have trouble looking into the mirror. Some days I just want to cry because I feel like I lost part of myself. When I have days like this I dress damn good and walk out my house with my head held high because I have something that the people around me will never have. Strength. True strength. While some people have problems that they can hide my disease is plastered all over my image. Sometimes it is easy to forget but my disease isn't really a disease but rather a blessing. I stand out. In a crowd I will always get noticed. I will always be different. Through this trail in my life I have been blessed with an understanding of other people that most wouldn't care to have. When someone feels like they are unattractive, unwanted, or worthless I can relate. I know more than most how hard it can be and I will always be there with a shoulder to cry on. When most people would walk away from their enemies I give them a hug so they are not alone. I have the power to change other people's lives because I have had my own problems. I know what it's like. I have grown to be strong. The hardest demon to fight is your own and once you find a way to accept yourself then no one, not a single person, will have the power to tear you down. You'll have the power and the strength to make it through whatever other people may say or do.
You have the ability to change your life into whatever you want. Make the choice to be proud. Make the choice to embrace your difference. Make the choice the stand higher than those who will pull you down because when they are low you will have the power to pick them up and be the better person that they couldn't be. When you feel low and you can't look yourself in the eye remember that you aren't alone. There are countless people that understand how you feel. While our stories may be different, our journey through life varied, we all have something in common. We have been given the chance to be so much more than you could ever dream. At some point make the choice to take what you have been given and empower yourself through it and you will always find yourself at the head of the pack.
More than anything, always remember, no matter what you feel, no matter how hard your life gets, when you feel like your caught in the rain with no umbrella, I will ALWAYS think your beautiful.

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