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Shaved my daughter's head tonight
At her request. I thought she'd want to save the hair, but she didn't. Wasn't much there anyway -- she had more when she was born, I think. It's just so hard to believe -- in the beginning of the summer, she had a full head of hair and bushy eyebrows. Now she's bald and losing the eyebrows too. Anyway, I just had to come somewhere and share where people would understand. I'm just so sad. She cried a little bit, but not too much. She's getting a cold too, so that didn't help her feel any better. And I have to put my poor old dog to sleep this week. Not a good week...
Sorry to be such a downer!
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Christine on
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Hi, I'm sorry to hear about her cold and your dog, I'm a dog person, so I understand how hard that is. I buzzed what was left of my hair a little over a month ago, they asked me if I wanted to save some of it too, I said no also. I know you are sad, but I can only tell you how I feel now. Losing it everyday and not knowing when, or if it would stop, not feeling comfortable because I thought I wasn't hiding it well enough, limiting what I could and couldn't do, like take a walk on a nice, but windy day, were all tearing me up, it was controlling my life, and I hated it! I have never felt better since I made the decision. at night when I take my wig off is still hard, I would like to find a wig I
could sleep in, but I can't imagine that being comfortable. Your daughter is so lucky to
have you in her life, you didn't say how old your daughter is? If she is old enough to come on here and share her feeling, and ask questions that would be good. I've gotten more help here than anywhere else. Best wishes to both of you.
Christine
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Permalink Reply by Sarah's Mom on
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Thanks, Christine. She just turned 12. She doesn't want to come here yet, nor meet anyone IRL with alopecia. Maybe that will come with time. She goes wigless at home, even if we have (close) friends over. She said maybe she'll go bald to school for Halloween, tell everyone she's wearing a skullcap. But she was kidding. At least she can still joke about it.
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Thank you. It just seems so sudden and so damn unfair, doesn't it? She is wearing a cap so she doesn't have to feel and see her bald head. I noticed she wrote "be strong" on her wrist sometime today. I didn't even mention that to her -- she must have thought of it on her own.
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Hi, Sarah's Mom
You and your daughter are both beautiful strong women! She is strong now if she wrote "be strong" on her wrist. She is developing coping skills that will help her. Good for her! And you're a good Mom for seeking out help and advice for the both of you. I'm also sorry to hear about your dog. I've always said that children and animals should never suffer. It is unfair. I don't know your perspective as a parent of a child who has Alopecia. I only know the support from my son who has never known me to have my own hair his entire life. I did have patches of loss when I was in grade school but then it all fell out after my son was a year old. I now have my head waxed occasionally--the irony of that! I've learned that the unconditional love from family and friends is essential. Your daughter has that. She will be OK in the long run. But she will also have bad times and this will be absolutely normal. When *you* need to, write "be strong" on your wrist. In the meantime, we'll be strong for the both of you here. Also, I would definitely check out naaf.org. They have a huge network for children with Alopecia and events, such as their annual conference, that help everyone involved.
peace & strength,
Maryanne
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Thank you. She wants us to get matching tattoos saying "Stay Strong." I have always been against tattoos (for me) but I am willing. Lucky for me, you can't get a tattoo in California until age 18! I just wish we could do a Freaky Friday movie where we wake up in each other's bodies. I want to go to school for her and give those kids a piece of my mind!
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Permalink Reply by Alliegator on
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I am so sorry for what you are going through, and I am sorry for your loss. Dogs bring us such joy in our lives, and it is very difficult to let them go. You are in my thoughts! It definitely sounds like a difficult week for you. I have to say that your daughter sounds like a very strong girl. She has courage, and I don't know if I would have been able to do what she did at her age. I know that down the road, what you did for her, will mean a lot when she looks back on it. My Mom always said to me that she would shave her head in a heartbeat, but she never offered to help me shave my head. I shave my head now, and I have for a while. I love it. It has helped me to cope with the hair loss. I love wearing wigs too as well as hats & scarves. This is a great website. Keep coming back! There are lots of mothers on here who have children with Alopecia so you are not alone.
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Really? Why wouldn't your mom do it? I have electric clippers so it's easier than a regular razor. I offered to shave my head too, but she keeps saying no way, what's the point of that. I just keep thinking of that movie Freaky Friday and wishing we could trade places for a few years, at least through middle school, which is so hard for every kid, I think, and especially a bald one.
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I am so sorry and if I can help in anyway message me. My daughter lost all of her hair and brows and lashes when she was a senior in highschool. The losing part is by far the worst part of it. You will find a way to deal and help her lead a normal life. My daughter is in her 3rd year of college and doing well with AU. She has plenty of friends, a boyfriend etc. She doesn't spend much time dealing with her alopecia, I do that for her. I feel your pain. Let me know what I can do to help.
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Thank you! Right now knowing there are other moms out there helps a lot. I would like to find a support group in Los Angeles but so far haven't had any luck. Amazing the things we take for granted until they are gone.
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Permalink Reply by Dj on
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Sorry that u had to deal with all that. Im driving my mom nuts since i got this diagnosis. Best wishes to you and your daughter and your dog.
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Thank you. My mom, who is 81, is going nuts trying to find a cure, a reason, a solution. She keeps coming up with half-baked notions. It's driving her crazy that it is what it is and has to be accepted. She is sure there is a cure right around the corner.
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Permalink Reply by Sunflower25 on
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I had my husband shave my head the first time. He also didn't want to do it, but did. I'm very thankful of him for that - and she likely is of you too.
Very sorry about the dog. :(
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