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Comment by Anne Louise on December 28, 2017 at 10:10am

Thanks everyone for listening to my rant. I got my period the next day, which helped explain my mood! I have tattooed my eyebrows and was thrilled the first year or two, but I've had 2 touch ups this year alone and they simply don't look as good as they once did...sort of faded, not the crisp "hairs" I once had.  Plus the week of healing has me self conscious.  I work with elementary aged children, who often have no filter! "Your eyebrows are red" (while healing) "Why do you draw on your eyebrows with a marker?"  Make me wonder what adults are thinking but not saying!! Every adult I know say they look fabulous, and often are surprised when I mention they are not real.

I've been considering eyebrow wigs. Has anyone had any success with them? I've watched a few You Tube videos and I'm intrigued. They seem more cost effective too.  I'm paying $200 every 5-6 months, and it's a full day off work, which is difficult to do, especially now that I'm in a permanent position.

Also, I have had great success with Lash Boost. by Rodan and Fields. My lashes are thick and gorgeous! I had used Latisse for a while but my eyelids would get red and I found the countless brushes annoying. Lash Boost is much easier to apply and gave me better results.

Comment by Minter on December 28, 2017 at 9:51am

Haha HalfbakedWho, food orgies! Yes, that is what's been going on here for me too, huge great food orgies!! :-D  

I've gotten to the point where I will spend $$$ to make myself feel better, like getting my brows done, getting lashes tinted, Lucinda Ellery (even though it didn't work for me) and facials, it does make a difference for sure.  It is not money that is easily spent for me, but I have decided that this is the only life I have and I can either go through it miserable about this stupid hair or make some budget changes to spend more money on ME and be a little happier about myself! 

It is frustrating that all the good hair places seem to be where you aren't!  I wish we could just head down to the local hairdresser and they would wave a magic wand and make our hair look fab, sigh. But traveling every 3 months is better then every 6 weeks or so I think.  

Illustrated8R, that is fantastic how the castor oil is helping you!  Amazing how something as simple as that will give results, however small, when all this powerful drugs are doing much of nothing at all it seems.  I am going to my doctor in march and will ask about Latisse for my lashes, & also to use on my brows, they are looking so great, even with my sparse brow hair- but like you said a little powder and pencil and they are good to go, nothing like the artistic work I had to do pre-microblading! 

Comment by Liz on December 27, 2017 at 4:48pm

Hi Ladies

I don't write on here much but I do read the posts. I've belonged to this group for about 5 years now. I have a Lucinda Ellery System which I have done in London. I also have my eyebrows tattooed. I'm happy to show pictures to anyone who is interested in the system. Just message me and let me know xx

Comment by Halfbakedwho on December 27, 2017 at 2:53pm

I am so sorry I messed up your name, Anne Louise. I was in the car and fiddling with my phone, please excuse me. The sentiment remains the same - do what makes you feel best. My hair on the top of my head is eroding like the ice caps - gradually but continuously, every damn day. The hardest part for me is feeling powerless. So, just the idea (like Minter said) of hair « waiting » for me someplace (in some salon, somewhere) makes me feel better - like I can do *something*.

I definetly have days when I feel terrible ; my younger sister lives in Vegas and her job requires always looking amazing, which she does. I really believe in spending a bit to improve my confidence - I can do without new clothes, for example, and spend the money on my hair or face which for me is more important, and what I will see in the mirror more than my shoes. 

I too have been eating waaaayyy too much sugar, and dairy, and am totally itchy. Hard to know what’s what - dry air, food orgies, family get-together stress : (. 

Yes Mark Glenn is London and it seems that his « system » doesn’t exist anywhere else at all! Go figure. For now am considering going there for the hair extensions which are just for every three months. From here it’s doable. But am going to find out about what’s in my town first. Why wouldn’t a wonderful cap-free system ONLY exist in London??? 

I too worry about looking too obviously pouf-y on top - I have seen women after chemo with that « topper » look. But if I’m going to change I’d like to do it over a break when people tend to come back to work with different hair anyway ; ). 

Comment by illustr8r on December 27, 2017 at 2:53pm

@Minter I think that lessening gluten/diary has made me feel better. I lost a bit of weight, don't feel bloated and uncomfortable after eating etc...and definitely less itchy. Maybe it has affected my hair because of less gut irritations which from reading says is a trigger for inflammation. (?!?!)

I have been using Castor Oil for over a month now. I had an outline of flaking skin at my hairline and about 2 inches back. Never have had that before. My scalp felt tight too-so I started using the Castor Oil I had bought as a miracle cure for my missing eyebrows some time ago-as a lark-to see if it would help my scalp. My dr. told me to only use Clobetasol if I absolutely had to now. Anyway, after about a week the flakes/peeling eased up and now it's gone. A week ago I noticed my hair had some body to it and laid better. This week I see the little sprouts popping up in my widows peak and along the sides in places too. My dr. saw no indication of new hair growth when I saw her November-which I took to mean when that hair came out nothing was going to replace it. What's coming in now is gray- which is absolutely fine with me as long as it keeps coming!

@AnneLouise I totally agree with Minter- get your eyebrows micro bladed. Go online and do research and find a good technician (with plenty of good reviews and client pics of their work). It will make you feel so much better-one less thing to do when you get ready. Mine have faded a bit but they are a good base for the powder and pencil. Also- get Latisse from your eye doctor or derm. My once thick eyelashes are affected by this crap too and started to fall out-leaving gaps along the lash line. I've been using Latisse and they have filled back in nicely. I brush the excess over my brows and I have a few more hairs growing there too which help with the illusion.

So much time,effort and money to make ourselves look and feel normal. It's exhausting!!! Stupid friggin disease!!!! 

Comment by Minter on December 27, 2017 at 2:11pm

Anne Louise, I feel everything that you are saying- and it is awful you are going through so much stress right now.  When life is like this the last thing you need to deal with is your hair.

I went back and forth for a long time trying to decide if my hair loss was "enough" to justify getting "hair"- I am pretty much the same as you, have lost about an inch of hairline and sides and thinning on top along with almost non existent brows. 

Since the FFA started I have become an expert at sidling out of the range of a camera indoors or outdoors, but especially outdoors- if I go to a school game or something I make sure to sit on the top bleachers so no one can see the top of my head, always have sun or regular glasses on my head to hold down the sides of my hair, so many things to be be aware of, its not easy being us FFA-ers! 

One thing that has made me feel a million times better is getting my brows micro bladed, it is like I have a face again- maybe it is something to look into to get done in time for the wedding so there is time for them to heal?  

As HBW suggested, extensions might work for your another thing to consider is a topper for the photos and all that pre-wedding "stuff"!  A real or synthetic hair one can be found online or at a local wig salon for a pretty reasonable price and cut to your hair style and colored by your hairdresser and you can put it on and take it off whenever you want.  I got a good "real" hair one that is an almost match to my own colored hair on sale from Uniwigs, I haven't used it yet, but it is still there on my dresser waiting for me!  An excellent site for info on toppers is Corner of Hope and Mane, she has a Huge amount of advice and tips on how to wear them.  

Whatever you decide to do for you sister's wedding I am sure you will look beautiful and we are always here for you to vent or whatever :-) 

Halfbakedwho, I have read about Mark Glenn and I do like what he does, I think, am not for certain that he is actually Lucinda Ellery's ex and went off on his own.  I am not in London enough to go there though, if they had a place in NYC also it would be something I would consider!   

CurlyK, I'm glad to hear you were so sad at first too, I know that sounds awful doesn't it! But what I mean is I thought there was something wrong with me for being upset for having too much hair! It is a bizarre feeling to go from not so much hair to thick hair again.  

That is great that you have gotten used to your system, especially being in Florida- your hair looks fantastic in your photo also!  I think you are right that it is trial and error to find what works best for each of us- I just wish it didn't cost so much money for the trial and error part!

I am in the Northeast and it is bitter cold right now, but if I just get a little overheated here I literally want to rip the system off my head that is how much it bothers me when it gets to that point, even after washing my hair I have to use the blow dryer to dry the "system part" right away as it irritates me so much- so I don't even want to think what it would be like for me being all sweaty and hot in the  summer :-(  

Oh and the itchy skin, CurlyK, it is very much worse for me in the winter. I think the dry air doesn't help and wearing long sleeves ( I am always pushing them up when they start to bother me) , but it is only on my wrists/forearms- it is the weirdest thing and has been going on for several years now. I guess I should maybe consider giving up sugar and dairy- I could maybe think about limiting my sugar, but I love dairy! Yogurt, milk, cheese, ice cream, that would be a real tough thing to give up. I actually will be limiting sugar after the new year, time to get back on track with eating, so ice cream & most cheeses will be gone from my diet anyway ;-/ 

Comment by Halfbakedwho on December 27, 2017 at 1:24pm

Hugs to you Anne Marie, and thank you to Minter for sharing your experience with Lucinda Ellery.

if it were me in your shoes AM, and I was afraid of wind and candid shots, I would get extensions. I don't show much yet either but like a few people said further down I prefer not to wait. Just the idea that I will be able to hide this reassures me, and I see already how little meds seem to help, never mind the eventual side effects of taking even stronger meds. I take comfort in aesthetic dissimulation ; )

minter there's a place called Mark Glenn in London that offers something very different from LE

I may go check it out, no cap! No confinement!!

Comment by Anne Louise on December 27, 2017 at 11:02am

Hello ladies, I haven't written in a while yet I continue to read all of the posts. But today I feel a great need to vent to the only group of gals who will get it! In October I turned 50 and I did my best to celebrate, but knowing how much I've aged in the past 5 years made it tough. I have always looked 10 years younger, but now I look at least my age if not older thanks to !@#$$%FFA.

In the past 6 weeks, I had surgery, started a new full time job (had been working part time while caring for our 3 young children), my husband lost his job and my only sister got engaged. I am a mess of stress! And yes, I have noticed more shedding, which just makes the stress worse!

Last night I went with my sister for her bridal gown fitting. I am beyond thrilled for her, as she finally met Mr. Right and is getting married for the first time at the age of 41. She looked absolutely gorgeous, her thick curls cascading under the veil. I simply couldn't look at my reflection in the mirror. Over the years we have often been asked if we are twins, which of course always brightened my day, but in recent years that hasn't happened. She is not having a bridal party, just me as her matron (how I hate that term!) of honor.

I am dreading the next few months and her wedding day of April 7th and hating myself for it. I don't want to go dress shopping and I am dreading the pictures! I do plan to ask my sister to keep me out of any outside professional pictures (that dreaded wind). But there will be so many candids plastered over Facebook (I have several cousins who love posting pics all day long)  I don't have enough loss to warrant any hair pieces just yet.

The stress of helping her plan her wedding, the bridal shower, amidst our financial uncertainty and trying to learn my new job is more than I think I can bear. And knowing that stress leads to more hair loss...well I'm sure you can all relate to that!

My sweet sister and I have so many pictures of us together over the years, but now I hate posing for pictures, especially next to her. I guess because we do look alike, yet she is younger and prettier. We both are known for our thick curly hair.  I have lost my thick dark eyebrows completely and over an inch of my hairline. The wayward curls are hard to manage some days now that I maintain a fringe. I hate that I have lost my confidence in my appearance. I feel like I am back to that awkward age of 12 when I think everyone is staring at me. I try to focus on my inner beauty, blah blah blah, but this @#$%FFA just sucks!

Thank you for listening and I am grateful to have this forum where I can come and be understood.

Comment by CurlyK on December 27, 2017 at 10:31am

Minter, I understand how you would feel claustrophobic. When I first got my hair I sobbed most of that night and the next day. Having hair was as traumatic as not having it. It felt heavy and thick and “too much”. I had my regular hair stylist cut it some more until it looked more like me. Then, over time, I have gotten so used to it a lot of days I don’t even think about it. I live in Florida which is above 70 degrees most of the year. My head does get hot on those hot summer days but since I am “dry” and not “oily” I’ve not had any trouble coming “unglued”. 

With all of the holiday eating I’ve noticed I’ve been more itchy all over. Time to get off the dairy and sugar again. I know that is what exacerbates my itching. 

Each of us goes through trials and errors until we find what works best for us and helps us feel our best. I’m proud of you Minter for trying a new system. It may not be right for you right now but maybe in the future. Until then, know you are beautiful just as you are!

Comment by Minter on December 27, 2017 at 9:28am

I'm also off meds except for the odd use of Clobetasol- not on my head but on my forearms/wrists when I get such intense itching that I am actually drawing blood from scratching :-( but for the most part tea tree oil helps there and on my scalp.  I am intrigued by your use of castor oil Illustrated8R, do you think it is combo of the oil and your diet that is giving you new little baby hairs?  My diet is awful right now between traveling and the holidays, this new year it will all change!  

I agree that if you are going to get "hair" it is better to do it before it has gotten really noticeable- that was my thinking when I went to Lucinda Ellery's. It  has been a little over two weeks since I got my "hair" and I LOVED it, I was in London for one more week after getting it done and constantly looking in the mirror- pinning it back, trying different styles. But, now here I am back in the USA, in the "real world" well my normal world haha, I am not so happy with it anymore.  I get overheated and it starts to itch and is super uncomfortable and I am having a lot of trouble taping the sides.  So I have come to the conclusion that it is time to cut my losses and time for it to come off. I know it is only a couple of weeks, but when you know something, you just know it is time!

Don't get me wrong, I think it is an awesome system and I have looked in the mirror every which way and asked trusted people to see if they can notice any attachments and nothing can be seen and have taken about a million photos of the top of my head (wear the bangs are attached) and it looks very natural.  Everyone (that doesn't know about the system and those that do) says that I look great, my vacation abroad must've agreed with me haha!  

But it is just not for me, which I should have known as I hate even wearing a hat or a scarf or having anything on my head for more then a few minutes, but I really wanted this to work for me, so I tried it.  Luckily, I think, it was good that I went with this smaller system and didn't put all my eggs in one basket and pin my hopes on the larger system as it would have been more then double the cost.

I wish I could make it work for me, but it has gotten to the point where I just feel it all the time and dread washing my hair because that means I have to replace the tape. It doesn't help that I am recovering from shoulder surgery either and having to reach up and do the tape on the sides is sooooo painful!!  

The system and the tape works for so many ladies, I guess I am just one of those that it is not meant for.  So it will soon be back to my regular hair.  I have been thinking that when it gets to the point, I will go short with a pixie sort of cut then if I have to, I will shave my head and wear a wig if I want or don't want, something that I am can  take off and on when I want to. It sounds weird, but not being able to take this system off makes me feel trapped and claustrophobic! 

Again, don't want to turn anyone off of LE at all, they do awesome work and you are made aware of every single step that they are doing, and you walk out of there looking fabulous but it is just not for me :-( 

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