I usually blog about my hair, but today there are other things on my mind that I would like to share....both heartwarming and exiting also a bit sad,
I miss my momma, six years ago today she passed away suddenly. At the time I was 17, my older sister 19, and two younger brothers, 10 & 11. It wasnt a car crash or a murder, It was a illness no one was aware of, bacterial endocraditis (i think i spelled that right) She had an infection inside her heart that created a small hole in her heart that pumped blood into her lungs instead of her body. It was due to intravenous drug use, her symptoms showed for two weeks and she was gone, however she was not honest with the doctors about her past with drugs, and they assumed she has a slight case of pneumonia. She didnt use drugs all the time, when she was younger is was frequent, and then she stopped and went a while without them, but for some reason she did use them at least once in the weeks before her death. I have accepted the realty of my mother's death and come to terms with god in the whole thing. He does not stamp an experation date on the bottom of your foot so, your time is your time. But I still miss her, A year after her death I found out I was pregnant with my first child (I was 19). It was difficult to go into motherhood without her. Although I have a WONDERFUL stepmother and family, you still miss your mom. In the past 6 years, there have been a whirl wind of emotions, with my siblings and I, in eachother and by ourselfs, we dont talk about mom much, but we know she is on all of our minds. *sigh* So today expecting my second child, and going through all the excitement with getting ready for the baby, and just now buying my first home, and then loosing my hair all of a sudden, I miss her...and I shed a tear for her, And i know she is proud of what my siblings and I have done without her physically. I just still long for that last goodbye.

ON A HAPPY NOTE!!!!!!!!!
******* ITS A BOY****
I found out on accident at the hospital last night, when i went in for a kidney sonogram. I have had SEVERE back pain for the past couple days, and the lady who did my sonogram wanted to see the baby, and he was butt up, showing us what he had! Totally unreal, although I saw it clearly, I was fooled with my first baby, they said she was a he. I am overwhelmed with joy, now i need to pick a name