Comment by Carol on April 14, 2008 at 9:09am

Wow, you're blog really brought me back! I remember facing these issues YEARS ago when I was about 13. I finally got bald enough to need a wig and back then they didn't sell wigs for little girls where I lived so I ended up with this mop on my head that didn't fit well and looked like it should be sitting on my mom's head. It was extremely difficult to face anyone looking like that - even myself. Then came the next wig. Everyone already knew what I looked like, what would happend when I showed up with a whole new colour, style - whatever? Yeah, I took some heat over it but that was in high school. As an adult, I've noticed that new hair usually brings quite the attention and normally it is good. There is something important you will learn over time and that is to accept your situation. It will get easier to talk to people and you will notice that most of your problem is your own fears. I normally go out bald but wear a wig at times and have had hair stylists comment on how wonderful my hair looks (they never knew I wore a wig, even with my eyebrows drawn on)! I know you feel the way you do now but I promise, it will get easier. Keep your chin up!

Comment by Cheryl, Co-founder on April 14, 2008 at 9:57am

I guess I had a couple of thoughts on your blog. First, I think it is important to prepare ourselves for lives events with alopecia. So your thoughts are perfect, to allow others to realize and prepare for some of the anxieties that may come.

I agree with Carol, self-acceptance of our situation and what it now means in our life is important. I am well aware that I may never have another full set of hair. I know having alopecia areata means I have to deal with patches even though I shave my head. Another indication that I am not just shaving my head for a cool personal style. But I have come to realize that my patches are reality. I no longer try to hide them. I will shave my head a couple of days a week but if I am tired or just don't get around to it, it is now ok for someone to see that I have patches of dark hair growth. People may have questions and chances are may talk behind my back. If they ask tell them about alopecia, if they talk behind my back... somebody else does...

And I guess it is the same with the wigs, when we get to the point of just doing what we want to do, be it go longer, shorter, blonder and then back again. People will find out, will talk a little and then it will just become history to them. But at that point you are free. I don't think any one of us is braver than the next, ask any of us who no longer wear wigs, or change wigs around from blond, to red, to blue, to long, to short... we all experienced the anxiety. I think it is more the realization that that highly anxious moment, takes care of all the little anxious moments that can simmer for years and hold us hostage to our fears. And most of all keep us from living freely.

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