Comment by Carol on June 18, 2008 at 8:00pm

I'm sorry to hear you are having a bad day Mandy. It's always a personal decision to shave, you need to be ready for this on your own. Shaving certainly takes away the need to tuck in the stray strands when you put your wig on and if your spots grow back then the rest of your hair will be at par with it and it can all come back uniformly. Wigs are quite warm and with summer around the bend you will notice the extra heat, especially if you keep your hair. I was 13 when I went through this exact thing, when kids are at their meanest so I understand how you must feel and it is pretty scary. Since you'll have your hair for the whole weekend before you go back to work, try it with your hair and see how it feels and if you find it's uncomfortably warm, consider shaving it or at least cutting it shorter. Something else you could do is just keep it long and start wearing scarfs and bandanas, it will still look like you have a full head of hair. There are a lot of options so don't feel bad that the pony tail doesn't work anymore - you are a sweetie, don't ever change!

Comment by sgomez on June 18, 2008 at 8:17pm

I agree w/ Carol!
It's okay to have bad days, sweetie. I fully expect you to. You are losing your hair, your crowning glory for goodness sakes! It's a terrible thing to have to go through, but you will get through it. Just keep your awesome personality, and try something new! Good luck to you :-) Sarah

Comment by Mandy on June 18, 2008 at 9:01pm

Just posted pics, too, that I took today...if y'all wanna see where I stand right now...

Comment by leanne dallen on June 19, 2008 at 1:23am

mandy i am in the same boat as you i have not lost all my hair iether i use to try and do my hair but as it progressed i could not cover up any more ,so i started to were scarves ,the crying does stop for awhile but then you have another bad day it is just how it is untill we ecept ourself i am not quite there but close i think.i got a wig but refused to wear it cause i think i thought if i wore it i was giving in ,but one day i put it on and everyone loved it and it did make me feel human again ,but i still have problems with it ,i am always scared it will come off but that is another thing i and we have to learn to deal with,but since i have been wearing it i dont think about aa as much and my bald patches have fuzz back on them so cheer up and try to relax.as for shaving your head i felt like i had to shave mine but i never did cause i think in the long run id feel worse,but you have to m ake that choice i hope next time i talk to you ,you are having a better day so hang in there and please cheer up

Comment by Tony on June 19, 2008 at 6:32am

I was in a similiar position a few weeks ago. Admittedly, the decision is much different for a man than a woman. In that light, there is little that I can offer of any value. But please know that we are here for you, to walk beside you during this trying times, to chear you on during the good days and offer comfort on the not so good.

Comment by Billie on June 19, 2008 at 11:30am

Oh Mandy! I feel for you right now!
Reading your post took me back to the days I felt the very same thing!!! My loss was slow at first but then the more I stressed over losing it -- it progressed so fast the first time within 2-4 weeks I went from long hair to bearly there hair. It threw me into a major depressed state of all I did was cry. I did overcome it but it took a few weeks and some strong talks from my family. My dad was the main person who helped/talked me thru it..... You look like you have really long hair as I did. (halfway down my back) I can make a suggestion, but as everyone else has said; make sure what you think you want to do is really what you actually want. My suggestion is to do as I did; When I knew it was coming out again, I cut my own hair to my shoulders then gradually shorter and shorter so I did not deal with the shock of going from long to none all at once again..... (I have a case of mine growing for a few years then falling out again... Mine has done this over 3 times now..... Each case is different.)
Thanks goodness you already have your wig. Your stylist will help you with the best look for you.
When you come home from work try it on and maybe play with headbands, combs, barrettes, etc..... It will look good on you an you will still be beautiful~~~Put it on and wear it proudly.... When you get used to wearing it; you will feel 98% better about yourself as well.
Just remember that the good and the bad days will always be there, but you are stronger than this. Just don't let it keep you down.... Even to this day, 17 years later, I still have good days and bad days. I usually talk to others, come here or my other support groups or write my feelings down. We are here for you, Mandy as well as each other.....
Hang in there..... (sending you a few cyberhugs for more better days ! )

Comment by Drew on June 19, 2008 at 12:50pm

Mandy, sorry to hear you had a rough day. Keep your chin up though and keep pushing on. You can't let this disease beat you, but I know you're stronger than it is. I think the wig is great, and I can't wait for you to post pictures of it. As always we're here for ya, and if you need to talk let me know I could give ya my AIM screen name or something... best of luck

Comment by Kristen Ridenhour on June 19, 2008 at 8:52pm

Sorry you're day was bad. I know it is hard to deal with losing your hair. I still remember exactly how I was feeling when I was at the stage you're in now. It will get easier with time. Try to stay positive and if you need anything we are all here for you.

Comment by Yvonne~Yhoney on June 20, 2008 at 1:13am

Grieving for your hair is very hard and you have to find the best way for you to feel comfortable with the loss. I cut my hair short when the spots got too big and wore head-wraps and wigs for a long time before doing the complete shave to bald. You have to pace yourself and go with your gut feelings...not someone else's. Believe in you and it will work for you! :)
~Yvonne

Comment by Tina on June 20, 2008 at 3:53am

Oh my gosh Mandy...I was you not that long ago. Seriously, there finally came a day when I just broke down because I couldn't cover all the spots anymore either and I also was extremely late to work! I couldn't bring myself to shave my head either, because in a way, it's like you don't want to let go of the hair that is hanging on. I just recently shaved my head, a year after having alopecia. Everyone told me to do it, and I even now reccommend for you to do it too, but really...it has to come from YOU. You have to make the decision and be ready to do it. And if you aren't ready, you don't need to. You can wear your wig and have your hair underneath. Just put it in a ponytail and tuck in under. You can even cut it really short, so it's a little bit easier to hide under your wig. So, the good thing is you don't have to be ready right now, and when you are, you are. When I finally decided to do it about one month ago..it felt great. If I knew then how much better I would feel and look, I would have done it sooner, but..I just wasn't ready. Hope is such a strong thing to hang onto with the hair that you do have, but just because you shave your head, doesn't mean you have lost hope. And to be honest, it was better, at least for me, to look in the mirror after shaving my head. I felt like I didn't look as sickly and strange. And, it became MY choice to shave my head and loose that hair that I had left. It's like I was finally in control, instead of my hair being in control. So, it can be a very liberating thing, once again..when you are ready. =) I'm sorry to ramble on, but I literally JUST experienced this, and I was totally doing the same thing you were with covering bald spots, and I really NEVER thought I would be completely bald OR shave my head, so I know exactly how you feel!

Hang in there, and once you get into the routine of your wig, you are going to LOVE it!!

Comment

• ‹ Previous
• 1
• 2
• Next ›
• Page