Comment by Linda on July 21, 2008 at 2:12pm

What a wonderful way to say, accepting Alopecia is not giving up, surrendering lends way to strengthening the soul. I had to accept Alopecia at a very young age, acceptance allowed me to grow, be strong and live happy. I think when we learn to give up on desire, there is always something wonderful waiting around the bend...if I understand you, is that what you mean?

Comment by Cheryl, Co-founder on July 21, 2008 at 2:47pm

Hi Linda, I think we will never know what is behind the bend unless we let go. We can't have them both. So either we get stuck in our current situation, or we let go and see where that leads us, trusting that we will come out on our feet regardless. In that new place I think it requires more creativity in our thinking and implementing and that process can opens us up to real joy. In all honesty I have never felt more feminine than I do since I accepted by alopecia. Once I got started, there was real joy in finding my look, my style and way to express my personal "beauty". My look is unique in my everyday life, but it is also custom fit to me. It was like decorating a home. Everything that went into it, said something about me. It was not dependent on what every one else had or did, I had to clear my own path. When we surrender we land on completely unfamiliar territory and although scary, it can also be exciting. As you know Linda, since you recently shaved your head. What do you think? How was your experience?

Comment by Mandy on July 21, 2008 at 3:03pm

This is so beautifully and perfectly put, Cheryl. I hope everyone reads this, especially those that are having difficult times right now. I receiving these words from my boss, of all people, when I first got diagnosed. I decided to tell him immediately and he called me up and basically said that as hard as it sounds you've just gotta accept it and move on with your life. And although he didn't put it in the best way exactly he was exactly right and I'm glad he said what he did. It helped me to accept my alopecia very quickly and be happy as I am. I thought, you can either be sad and upset about it, or you can accept it and move on and be happy just the way you are. So I decided to be happy. And I am.

Comment by Linda on July 21, 2008 at 4:16pm

When I was about eight or nine and woke up to a huge bald spot in the back of my head, I showed my Mother. She combed my usually two pony-tailed styled hair into a pony tail at the nape of my neck, covering my bald spot and I went to school and didn't give my hair a thought. As time passed I got two fifty cent piece size spots on either side of my head, I combed my hair in a style that covered all three spots though I sometimes wondered if the wind blew, they'd be exposed. When I got older, I used wigs and weave to uniquely express the free spirit within my soul, I surrendered to Alopecia and my life abounded. It wasn't always great, but for the most part, I was/am happy. Shaving my head has opened a whole new world, I'm more free than I've ever been, free to be me, so like you said, I can express both my inner and outer beauty with a creativity that is second to none. I never wore makeup, but I'm learning and I think I like it...maybe! But back to your question, my experience has been very liberating, surrendering to being bald is the most positive, exhilerating thing I've done in a long time!

Comment by Kristen Ridenhour on July 21, 2008 at 4:35pm

Wonderfully put! This reminds me of a quote I saw once, "some think it's holding on that makes us strong; sometimes it's letting go." I think letting go was apart of accepting that I had alopecia and knowing I just had to let it take its course. From there I had to regain my confidence and just try to become the person I wanted to be. It took awhile and I'm still working on it, but it gets easier everyday!

Comment by Cheryl, Co-founder on July 21, 2008 at 4:55pm

Kristen, I love that quote!

"Some think it's holding on that makes us strong; sometimes it's letting go."

I would have to say that letting go is actually harder than holding on. With letting go, you have to free fall for a bit and that part is scary until we touch ground again.

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