My new wig arrived Thursday. Absolutely gorgeous! very very long chocolatey brown colour. I'll post a photo at some point.
I got it, I loved it. It was brilliant.
And I was a total mess all day.
I'd be totally fine one minute, then all panicy and sad and angry the next. Then I'd be fine. I had no idea what was going on for quite a while.

Then it kind of struck me:

Imagine holding the thing you want most in your hand. Imagine getting that thing which will make everything better, even if you logically know it won't. Imagine getting that, and knowing it's a complete and utter lie.

I keep being told that "the first rule of wig care is respect your wig". How do you respect something a very significant part of you hates? how do you respect this incredible lie? how are you meant to believe "you look so pretty" when you're wearing this gross, obscene thing ?

Now this isn't my first wig. This isn't my first time dealing with this. But its the first time i've really understood what my issue was and had somewhere to talk about it with folk that "get it". folk that dont have to imagine. And I'm alright with the whole thing now, but seriously, my head turned into a big convoluted mess of feelings without a great deal of higher brain function for a couple of days there. Anyone else done that?? I'm not up to going completely bald in public, though parts of me want to.



also, update of the re-bald (as opposed to regrowth): just in the week or so since I last checked in i have two more 20 cents piece sized patches in my patches than last time. Bugger. But no sign of eyebrow escapism so yay there (touch wood).

also again, I'm still working on my alopecia piece for my Drama class major work. I'm still looking for people's "real stories" to tell. If anyone is at all interested leave a comment or inbox me. I'd love to hear from you :D




But yeah, anyway... I'm going to go watch some Doctor Who and not do my homework.