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How does what you project affect what others see?
The below article I found online last year (www.marieclaire.com), the article is no longer online, but I thought I would share it with you.
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One Woman, Two Messages
We photographed a gorgeous, size-14 model in a neutral pose and made the unretouched photos into two mobile billboards. Then we gave each billboard a vastly different message: one confident ("I think I'm sexy. Do you?"), one unsure ("I think I'm fat. Do you?"). We asked everyone who saw these billboards to visit MarieClaire.com and tell us what they thought. Here's how 4,000 people reacted.
The Results: The "I think I'm fat. Do you?" Message
55% of people answered "yes"
"Maybe fat is a bit harsh, but after reading the quote, then looking at her picture, my first response was 'yes.'"
--Tia, 25
"Claiming that you think you're fat makes you look fat -- a dose of confidence can mask slight imperfections."
--Rachel, 24
"I'd be impressed with her body if I saw her on a beach. But it's about attitude and confidence, and she doesn't have it."
--Bee, 25
"She seems to be unsure of herself, rather than confident about her body. Insecurity is not attractive."
--Ruth, 22
"It's true, her body is fatter than the modern beauty ideal, but her shape is still feminine and sensual."
--Barbara, 28
"Her posture and attitude make her look bigger than she is."
--Catherine, 30
The Results: The "I think I'm sexy. Do you?" Message
66% of people answered "yes"
"I love that she loves herself. Beauty is more than a set of measurements -- it's the whole package."
--Maureen, 44
"She's sexy because she has the guts to show herself in a way most women won't. Her confidence gives me confidence!"
--Jodi, 25
"She's sexy because she 's the size of today's woman. She's not willing to conform to the little-boy shape. She makes me proud to be a
woman."
--Nolita, 28
"She looks feminine and beautiful. I'm not crazy about the outfit, but hey, that's just me!"
--Elise, 29
"She is a goddess to behold. Nothing is more sexy than a voluptuous woman -- and confidence goes a long way."
--Jeff, 31
"You only see skinny women showing off their bodies on TV, but here, she's saying, 'I'm like you, and I think I'm attractive.' That's a
positive thing to see."
--Lindsey, 19
How Does What You Project Affect What Others See?
Along with the billboards, we ran Nicole's "fat" and "sexy" messages (separately) in newspapers and online to get a sense of what people across the country thought. The result? No matter what Nicole "thought," the majority of people agreed. We asked Ann Demarais, Ph.D., psychologist and co-author of First Impressions: What You Don't
Know About How Others See You, to examine the results of the whole study.
"When someone has never met you before, they look for any signals that will help them decide what they think about you," says Dr. Demarais. "The first words you say will be perceived as the 'real you.'" When a woman describes her body as fat, she immediately introduces a negative vibe that other people pick up on. "Pointing out your perceived flaws draws attention to something that may not be true," says Dr. Demarais. "Without any facts to go on, people will form an opinion based on whatever limited information you give them."
Similarly, calling yourself "sexy" sends a positive message to others -- and that translates into attractiveness. "A confident attitude puts other people at ease. In turn, they're more likely to see you in a positive light," explains Dr. Demarais. "It's what psychologists call 'mood contagion.' The attitude you project when you meet someone is
the emotion they begin to feel themselves, and they project that feeling back onto you." The bottom line? "You have the power to control what other people think of you."
Meet Our Model, Nicole
Nicole is a size 14, the same dimensions as the average American woman. "I went through a stage in high school where I was insecure about my body," she says. "In doing this story I thought, 'If I can help just one girl or woman feel better about how she looks, it 's worth it.' It took me a long time to learn that confidence is everything when it comes to how you look." Just how confident is Nicole? She agreed to let us leave her photo unretouched (after a
little hand-wringing), so others could see her as she truly is.
_____________________
We photographed a gorgeous, size-14 model in a neutral pose and made the unretouched photos into two mobile billboards. Then we gave each billboard a vastly different message: one confident ("I think I'm sexy. Do you?"), one unsure ("I think I'm fat. Do you?"). We asked everyone who saw these billboards to visit MarieClaire.com and tell us what they thought. Here's how 4,000 people reacted.
The Results: The "I think I'm fat. Do you?" Message
55% of people answered "yes"
"Maybe fat is a bit harsh, but after reading the quote, then looking at her picture, my first response was 'yes.'"
--Tia, 25
"Claiming that you think you're fat makes you look fat -- a dose of confidence can mask slight imperfections."
--Rachel, 24
"I'd be impressed with her body if I saw her on a beach. But it's about attitude and confidence, and she doesn't have it."
--Bee, 25
"She seems to be unsure of herself, rather than confident about her body. Insecurity is not attractive."
--Ruth, 22
"It's true, her body is fatter than the modern beauty ideal, but her shape is still feminine and sensual."
--Barbara, 28
"Her posture and attitude make her look bigger than she is."
--Catherine, 30
The Results: The "I think I'm sexy. Do you?" Message
66% of people answered "yes"
"I love that she loves herself. Beauty is more than a set of measurements -- it's the whole package."
--Maureen, 44
"She's sexy because she has the guts to show herself in a way most women won't. Her confidence gives me confidence!"
--Jodi, 25
"She's sexy because she 's the size of today's woman. She's not willing to conform to the little-boy shape. She makes me proud to be a
woman."
--Nolita, 28
"She looks feminine and beautiful. I'm not crazy about the outfit, but hey, that's just me!"
--Elise, 29
"She is a goddess to behold. Nothing is more sexy than a voluptuous woman -- and confidence goes a long way."
--Jeff, 31
"You only see skinny women showing off their bodies on TV, but here, she's saying, 'I'm like you, and I think I'm attractive.' That's a
positive thing to see."
--Lindsey, 19
How Does What You Project Affect What Others See?
Along with the billboards, we ran Nicole's "fat" and "sexy" messages (separately) in newspapers and online to get a sense of what people across the country thought. The result? No matter what Nicole "thought," the majority of people agreed. We asked Ann Demarais, Ph.D., psychologist and co-author of First Impressions: What You Don't
Know About How Others See You, to examine the results of the whole study.
"When someone has never met you before, they look for any signals that will help them decide what they think about you," says Dr. Demarais. "The first words you say will be perceived as the 'real you.'" When a woman describes her body as fat, she immediately introduces a negative vibe that other people pick up on. "Pointing out your perceived flaws draws attention to something that may not be true," says Dr. Demarais. "Without any facts to go on, people will form an opinion based on whatever limited information you give them."
Similarly, calling yourself "sexy" sends a positive message to others -- and that translates into attractiveness. "A confident attitude puts other people at ease. In turn, they're more likely to see you in a positive light," explains Dr. Demarais. "It's what psychologists call 'mood contagion.' The attitude you project when you meet someone is
the emotion they begin to feel themselves, and they project that feeling back onto you." The bottom line? "You have the power to control what other people think of you."
Meet Our Model, Nicole
Nicole is a size 14, the same dimensions as the average American woman. "I went through a stage in high school where I was insecure about my body," she says. "In doing this story I thought, 'If I can help just one girl or woman feel better about how she looks, it 's worth it.' It took me a long time to learn that confidence is everything when it comes to how you look." Just how confident is Nicole? She agreed to let us leave her photo unretouched (after a
little hand-wringing), so others could see her as she truly is.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Mandy on
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I really enjoyed this - thanks for sharing. I think this is oh so true. Confidence and attitude mean everything. The same is applied for Alopecia. If you can be confident with your hair/lack of hair the way you are others will see that.
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Permalink Reply by Orbit on
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I really enjoyed this post. It is very interesting to see how strangers preceive this woman.
I think that part of the reason I am able to smile these days is because I truly beleive that I am all that I can be. There was a time when I felt like an ugly duckling during my early teen years. I was stick thin, no feminine curves, freckles everywhere, uncoordinated, not confident in social situations, etc.etc.etc.
I don't really know when I started to beleive in myself (actually that's not entirely true). When I was 16-17 I met the most wonderful guy. He made me feel like a princess and I felt so loved. He helped me overcome a lot of insecurities and was there for me when my alopecia areata turned to alopecia universalis.
Since that time I have simply held my head high and made the best of a hairless situation. Of everything that I wear on the outside, I know the most important thing to wear is a smile.
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Permalink Reply by Eileen Simpson on
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Interesting how people think and act. If we hold our heads high and give us our own respect then almost everyone else who sees us will regard us in the same manner. If we draw our heads down, not making contact with the strangers eyes, then we've only let ourselves down. Hold your head high and be proud of who you are and that yes your different but every bit as good as the next person. If we do this then maybe it won't be so hard on the next person who is different. It's all in how we think that projects how others will see us.
Eileen
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