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Is going bald really necessary?
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Gail on
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Want to add that when I made the decision to shave my hair 4 days ago I felt excited and free at the same time. I'm wearing hats at the moment but my goal is to go hatless soon and feel comfortable with stares and comments. I'll say to anyone thinking of shaving the rest of their falling locks.... Just do it!!
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Permalink Reply by Christine on
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Marie,
I agree with you completely! I hung on to my bio hair as long as I could, a year ago I buzzed off the little I had left and wear a wig full time, I'm still working on getting use to my bald head, and have lost all my bio hair now, I still buzz off the white hairs I now have because frankly I look and feel better without them, but I don't think I'd ever feel comfortable being without my wig in public, I don't even feel good about it with my family yet, at least not totally. I don't think there is anything "not accepting" about my feelings I just feel better with my wig. I'm not hiding behind it any more than I'm hiding behind my make up.....which I'd never leave home without!! Lol
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Permalink Reply by Marieca on
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I agree. I have never gone out bald in public and I don't plan on it. I totally have accepted my Alopecia, but my head is not shaped favorably to go out bald lol
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I have worn my hair bald in public over a dozen times but I feel more comfortable with my wigs on. It's not that I'm embarrassed I just look better "to me" with hair.
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Permalink Reply by NettyNurse on
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I LOVE WIGS!....I have so much fun with them, so I can relate to you. The only thing is...I live in Florida, and the heat and humidity here make it impossible to be able to walk around outside with a wig on. I just recently started wearing bandanas out, and it is a world of a difference to me, and sometimes when I go to water parks, I go completely bald. I'm not gonna lie, the first time I didn't I almost went into a full blown panic attack, but I had to desensitize myself to people's reactions in order to get over it. It was tough to do, but the more I do it, the less I care about other's reactions. :)
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Permalink Reply by michelle on
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I think the question here is 'How do we define 'acceptance''? Acceptance, the last stage in the grieving process is a state of mind, a state of emotional stability and a state of living well with this disease. Acceptance isn't defined by either wearing a wig or going bald. What you wear on your head...or bald is a choice. I do believe that that the reasons behind each choice is more defining of acceptance. If someone choses to wear a wig because of the shame and feel the need to 'hide' their disease then acceptance is not achieved. Someone who decides to go bald can continue to be sad and depressed over their hair loss has not a place of acceptance.
My story....2 1/2 years ago at the age of 49 I had a beautiful head of long dark wavy hair. Today I have Alopecia Universalis...not a single hair to be found. I grieved! Boy did I grieve! I tried wigs..hated the way they felt and looked. For the most part I wore scarves and slouchy hats. The beginning of the summer I went bald for the first time. No question there are challenges here. You don't see a lot of women bald. Getting used to the stares (I barely notice anymore)..questions from strangers....some I answer and some I don't. For me, its all about feeling comfortable in my own skin. I feel no shame about this disease. It happened to me and I'm living with it.
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Permalink Reply by Marie on
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You'll get no argument from me: presenting a bald head requires much more bravery! However, I don't think it indicates that a person with Alopecia had accepted the condition more fully or more genuinely than an Alopecian who wears wigs. Individuals respond to this condition in different ways; going bald is not a required additional "step" that wig wearers need to take to have fully accepted their Alopecia.
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Permalink Reply by Cindie on
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I agree, Marie. And Hilary, who are YOU to judge who is "brave" or "cowardly?" Your definition is not the be all and end all.
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Permalink Reply by amym on
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Totally agree, Marie, and, I am bald head goer, but applaud those who wear wigs. Both are equally accepting of their alopecia, it just goes with what makes you more comfortable. I don't like wearing heals, but others do, that doesn't make me less or more brave, really same thing with a wig. I choose not to wear one, other choose to wear one.
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Permalink Reply by Garden Girl on
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Interesting discussion. There does seem to be a generational difference with many of the young woman proud, bald and beautiful. I was talking to a friend of mine who was active in the gay rights movement in the 70's. He said that as the movement was gaining momentum, there were strong inter group norms about what it meant to be gay-Out & proud. He said at the time, if you weren't out to everyone then the groupthink was "you're not gay.' Maybe something similar is happening with Alopecia Pride. As our movement of acceptance and education grows we feel a tension to be out and proud but as the movement moves along, maybe the momentum will swing back to individual choice.
Another point that I am considering-I am in my mid fifties, lost my hair as a kid and either wear scarves, wigs or nothing depending on my mood and the situation. I am a college professor. recently one of mu students suggested I check out the blog of a "proud alopecian" who chooses not to wear wigs. I felt like she was insinuating maybe I am not fully evolved...I thought I was but this experience made me think
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