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Smooth and Single

a site for the single people here to talk and bond

Website: http://www.alopeciaworld.com/group/smoothandsingle
Members: 655
Latest Activity: Jun 26

Discussion Forum

Why is the group so dead?

Started by Rob Baker Mar 29. 0 Replies

do boys care?

Started by sarah bradley. Last reply by Rob Baker Nov 23, 2021. 14 Replies

To tell or not to tell??!?

Started by tash. Last reply by Ryan Nov 10, 2021. 10 Replies

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Comment by Norm on November 27, 2010 at 6:25pm
I love that it says, further down that "deityusa" page, that "customers who bought this product also bought..... Snake Oil".
Kinda says it all, really, doesn't it? Caveat Emptor, as they used to say in good ole Rome. :)
Comment by Artemis88 on November 27, 2010 at 3:33pm
hey quick question- has anyone ever tried this?

http://www.deityusa.com/product.php?productid=16133&cat=249&...

My friend found it in CVS, and I was just wondering about it. I know there are so many products out there, but I am always curious.
Comment by Norm on November 24, 2010 at 1:04pm
Hey Linda, don't you believe no-one will want or love you without hair.... you're still "you" no matter what! Trying to find someone through dating sites is very much like applying for jobs.... you gotta keep putting y'self out there and "going for interviews", yeah? So don't give up and one day you'll land that dream fella! So many men, so little time.... :)
Comment by Linda on November 24, 2010 at 7:07am
Hello all, I too, am a 52 year old, single women with AU. I have been bald for two years. I recently got back on Match.com. I was on before when I had beautiful hair, now I wear a wig all the time. I have told some men before I met them and we never got together, I have been on two dates when I didn't tell them at all, but I wasn't interested in them, so why go there... I think it is hard for a man to accept a bald women, somedays it is hard for me to accept my bald head.... I would love to share my life with someone, but I really don't believe a man could love me with AU. I know some of you on this site have found love, and I am happy for you...
Comment by Gail on November 23, 2010 at 9:04pm
You got that right, TG! While my "luck" hasn't been that great lately (haha), I believe when the time is right, the stars will align. Hair or no hair.
Comment by Tallgirl on November 23, 2010 at 7:40pm
The one person on Match.com I told about the alopecia before meeting appeared to be just a looky-loo: he sized me up one minute at the pizza place, and took off without even sitting down. I immediately gave up on that site. There was no button to push for "bald" for women, so I just never responded to any men who said they liked long hair. I didn't want to frustrate either one of us. In the end, the whole site was just a bunch of nonsense to me, matching people up by career. E-harmony matched people up by the books read, but now I think they find more factors than that...although they NEVER listen to height preferences. I archive a lot of men who may be very nice, but...being tall, I want to be "the little woman." I found a much better way to meet someone great who doesn't mind my alopecia...by pure luck.
Comment by Gail on November 23, 2010 at 6:36pm
Hey Margo! In the same boat you are - single, middle-aged, wig wearer. I did the Match thing too - pre-hair loss and post. My photos have me with my real hair and with a wig, but nowhere did I mention the alopecia in my profile. When I went on dates, if I thought there was even remotely a chance for Date Two, I would tell the guy about the AA. On a couple of occasions, I told them before the first date. You can tell a guy's real intent and character by how he reacts. Guys are, for the most part, very visual and, unfortunately, very superficial when it comes to the standards for "beauty" and attractiveness and I think you can save lot of time and angst by just putting it out there. On the positive side, there have been a few guys who didn't care about the hair. I am single and not dating right now because I choose that - I am unemployed and have more on my plate than I can handle right now without complicating it with a relationship! I DO want to have a great guy in my life eventually and I WILL find him, but when the time is right! Hang in there!!!
Comment by Margo on November 23, 2010 at 2:31pm
Norm - I couldn't have asked for a better response, thank-you! So very insightful too. Yes in fact I miss my Ex more than my hair but I know I need to move on and would like to do it with someone who does accept me for who I am inside. I do still have struggles about being bald but support sites like this and people like you help remind me that I'm not alone and it really is OK.Not really a choice any of us would have chosen for our lives but there are a lot of worse things that peope are struck with. Norm, I will take your advice and work harder on my self confidence! Thank-you again!
Comment by Norm on November 23, 2010 at 12:40pm
Hi Margo, sounds like you're having a bit of internal conflict there over the "tell or not" dating thing. But I think it's down to how you feel about yourself.... how do you feel about being bald? Are you OK (ish!) with it? You sound like you are... so leave the bits about "hair" blank, and in the part where you write about yourself, mention that you're bald, but don't make a big deal about it. Then those that aren't keen won't bother you, and those that are alright with it will - and all those "when do I own up?" moments cease to exist!
For an example of what happens when you DON'T fess up, see my story in the "Funny Acts of Alopecia" group... :)
Personally, it's all about confidence for me, not whether you've got hair or not. I mean, if you act all timid and shy, who'll be interested? If you're outgoing and interesting, you'll be beating them off with a stick!
Little question fot ya, tho' : which do you miss most - your Ex or your hair?? ;)
Not-Entirely-Serious Norm

P.S. 48?? Is that all?? You're just a kid....
Comment by Margo on November 22, 2010 at 8:47pm
Good evening All!
So Its almost Thanksgiving...I hope everyone has a great Holiday. Anyway, thanksgiving brings mixed feeling for me. 3yrs ago I started losing my hair right after Thanksgiving and was completely gone on my head by Christmas, then the rest of my body by New Years. This all happened shortly after separation/divorce after a 15yr marraige. So bottom line I've been single for 3yrs and having alopecia has made it difficult for me to get out there and date. Aside from the fact that I'm 48yrs old! I'm interested in any advice out there about the possibility of dating. I just subscribed to Match.com last night and I'm very nervous! Do I put it right out there that I'm bald? What do you do if it does come down to going on a date? Wear a wig? or Hat? I want to find love again but how do I go about it in today's world of visual 1st impressions? I have never been much of a wig wearer because I guess I haven't really found one that I'm not so self conscious in, so I wear Hats....I know kind of wierd that I don't feel as self-conscious in Hats. Has anyone out there found love after becoming an Alopecian? When and how do you break the news?
 

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