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"I created my own beauty standards"
It amazes me how many people share their stories and triumphs about their alopecia. I recently found another one that I think the community would benefit from.
By Lennox Bishop
...Fast forward to a few weeks after I decided to shave off what remained of my hair—surrounded by friends and with many tears—my eyebrows began to fall out as well. This was a breaking point for me. Losing my eyebrows caused me to mourn in a new way because I felt the loss of the face I had known most of my life. According to American beauty standards, eyebrows are incredibly important, and I was not ready to let them go. I began drawing on my eyebrows, every day, with makeup. I would not allow anyone to see me without my eyebrows drawn on. Once I began college, I would run from the community bathroom to my dorm room after I showered, in an effort to minimize the number of people who saw my bare face.
"LOSING MY EYEBROWS CAUSED ME TO MOURN
IN A NEW WAY BECAUSE I FELT THE LOSS
OF THE FACE I HAD KNOWN MOST OF MY LIFE."
The turning point for me came after spending almost two years feeling masked and alone, tired of hiding my face from others. I was in Nicaragua, interning for the summer, and each morning, with tears, I would draw on “my face” with difficulty through the sweat brought on by the humidity and the sun. I felt trapped by beauty standards I knew were false and damaging. I felt trapped by my fear and my alienation from my own face.
With support from close friends who knew of my struggle, and with many prayers and contemplation, I went without a drop of makeup the day I left Nicaragua to come back to Seattle. I walked through the airport and felt people stare in a new way, and while it was scary, I realized that I had the strength within me to look those people in the eye and allow them to truly see me. From that day onward, I have never gone back to wearing eyebrows. I learned that my life as a bald woman gives me a unique relationship with makeup, and while I do not see it as a problem for those who choose to draw on their eyebrows, I have found great triumph in liberating myself from where I was hiding. I must love my face, first and foremost, because self-acceptance and love are what give us proper tools to fight the damaging beauty standards that plague our world and society.
You can read the full article here.
Source: www.endpain.com
By: Lennox Bishop
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Comment by Anne Williams on May 1, 2017 at 11:50pm
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Beautifully written blog by a string woman.
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Comment by Tom on May 7, 2017 at 12:26am
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Amazing post. Great message. I also came to accept myself for who I am. Once I stopped hiding and avoiding talking about my condition it took away all the fear. I've commented on this on other posts in this discussion forum and have had people strongly disagree . But once I stopped hiding and started answering people's questions I stopped being ashamed and afraid. This doesn't mean I'm glad I have Alopecia just that I've come to terms with it. It's a very small part of who I am. So thank you for sharing this .
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Comment by dianna on May 26, 2017 at 9:19am
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nice story.thank you for share with us
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Comment by hagster on May 26, 2017 at 10:23am
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That is an inspiring message, especially for "youngsters". Todays beauty standards are more accepting than when I grew up in the 50s & 60s - with war paint and high hair. Even freckles were a no, no.
So, as someone who (still to this day) would never think of leaving the house without full makeup and dressed appropriately for my day, I cannot give up old habits which have taken decades to establish.
Getting full blown AU at my age has been a challenge to figure out head coverings and new ways of makeup applications. This allows me to continue feeling confident about myself - which I have my entire life.
I admire the way the young men and women who have AA, AT, AU or other diseases handle the stress of being bald, losing eyebrows and lashes, and how they present themselves in todays world. Its certainly a minute by minute struggle.
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Comment by GRRLWR on May 26, 2017 at 1:07pm
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Lennox, you are beautiful bald and I admire your honesty and cour. As a woman over 60, I hope someday to be able to follow your example, in part or in whole. You ROCK!
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A wonderful blog post. Thank you Lennox. In the last month, I have shaved off the remainder of my hair and lost my eyebrows and lashes. Loosing the lashes was harder for me than loosing my hair. I still put on my face before going out but really hate wigs. I'm having fun with hats and scarves but only wear them when I will be in the sun for an extended period of time. It is also very helpful to read how other women in my age group are handling their hair loss. Rock on all you gals over 60!
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Comment by kymkym on May 26, 2017 at 8:57pm
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Beautiful post. Thank you so much for sharing.
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