I know we’ve had this conversation before here on Alopecia World. And I know I’ve shared my thoughts on it more than a few times. But let's take a look at it again.

A recent study out of King’s College London has stirred up some real thoughts— and I think it’s worth sharing:

 Stigma driving depression in alopecia patients rather than illness ...

The researchers found that the emotional toll of alopecia isn’t always tied to how much hair you’ve lost — but more to how you feel about it, and how others make you feel. People with just a few patches felt just as emotionally impacted as those with total hair loss. And the reason? Stigma. Perception. Shame. Fear.

And honestly, many of us already knew that. Because we’ve lived it.

But here’s where I want to take this conversation a little deeper.
Yes, stigma plays a role. Absolutely.
Yes, society needs to change how it views visible difference.
But if we’re being truly honest… some of the hardest stuff? It doesn’t come from outside.

It comes from inside our own heads.

It’s not just about how people treat us.
It’s how we’ve learned to treat ourselves.

That quiet voice that says:
“You don’t look right.”
“Put the wig on, they’ll be more comfortable.”
“Don’t go out like this.”
“Why can’t I just look normal again?”

And here’s the part that might make some people uncomfortable — but it needs to be said.

Sometimes we use stigma as a shield.

Sometimes, it’s easier to point to how other people treat us than to admit the real fight is happening inside.  We say, “The world doesn’t accept me,” when what we really mean is, “I haven’t accepted myself yet.”

So here’s the controversial question:
What if it’s not society holding us back anymore? What if it’s us?

That doesn’t mean the world is off the hook — far from it.
But if we’re still hiding, still waiting for approval, still shrinking from our own reflection…
Maybe it’s time to stop giving that power away.

So now I’m turning it back to you:

• When you think about your alopecia, how much of your struggle is external… and how much is internal?
• What beliefs or fears did you absorb early on that you’re still unlearning?
• And what has helped you shift how you see yourself?

Let’s make this a space where we can be honest — not just about what the world does to us, but what we do to ourselves.  Because I think that’s where the real healing begins.